Jasper Chen

Numb

2008-03-22T23:52:00.002+08:00

It's impossible for someone to completely numb himself from feelings, isn't it? Your brain just chooses to think about things that bothers you when you have too much free time in your hands.

It might have been easier if I had something to let go. The truth is, I have already let go of what has happened. What really bothers me now is me being back to square one, losing all that hope from the weeks that you thought finally your life is starting to take a turn.

I live a happy life, I must emphasise. But sometimes, you think you could live it happier, building false hopes that every single passing chance is a plan of fate. It's typical isn't it? When you are in that so called "honeymoon period", you find it a taboo to talk too much about yourself; just enjoying your time was most important.

Everything else that I deleted from this post are probably too emo for your eyes. I think I am lost. Very lost.

How to get a straight guy in 10 easy steps

2008-03-19T20:44:00.001+08:00

This is fucking great! LOL!

I'm lost

2008-03-17T00:00:00.002+08:00

Fans of Ainori will know about Remi, the 21 year old girl that is lost about her feelings towards Ryou, which is the guy that likes her. She claimed previously that she wasn't lost, but at the end, Ryou was sure of his feelings, but she was still lost in her feelings and starts pondering and juggling with the pros and cons of her being with Ryou.

I guess I am someone like her. I claim to know so much about what I want, the types of people I go for, the kind of character that suits me, etc. Yet, at the end do we always get a 100% of what we want? Absolutely not.

So many things had happened over this weekend. I don't even wish to put it out for display here in my blog, as if anyone would be concerned to know except the people I know that they do.

Digging out so many issues openly to discuss - well it sounds rightful enough to be truthful to each other to talk about your real feelings to the problems affecting a relationship. Yet, unknowingly you could be causing harm to the other party when you reveal bits of your opinions to a problem, when the amount of time you had spent observing and dealing with the problem doesn't even qualify for it to be digged out openly for discussion. You start to ruin the relationship and the feelings for each other takes a turn because of the fear of compromising the other party's comfort zone if a party decides to give in to that issue.

For the issues that I am dealing with now, I don't even know if it is even qualified to be an issue at all. Even speaking to a friend, the reaction and weightage of seriousness given to that issue is different due to conviction differences. Sometimes thinking about that simple blocking issue makes me feel so dumb. Isn't it an non-issue? Shouldn't I compromise in that area so that we can carry on with this relationship?

I don't know. I'm too lost now. I even think it is too late for rescue, as what I have caused and stepped into is a feeling that has turned for the worse overnight.

I'm tired. I want this to end. Quickly. If this relationship still works out, at least I can take a break and move on in the relationship. If it does not, it is certainly an escape into fresher air.

I'm trying too hard to make this work out, and sometimes I really wonder why.

Missing Terrorist!

2008-03-05T15:49:00.004+08:00

So a terrorist went missing, through the police apologised for the boo boo, they still expected the citizens to find him without reward, saying that this proves that Singaporeans can really "work as a nation" in times like these.

But why can't they explain why the common question in the street is: How did he escape?

Click here for the wanted poster from the police (PDF) if you want to print and stick it above your bed.

While you are still reminded to keep a lookout for the most publicly recognised face in Singapore after David Beckham or maybe... Tammy, I don't personally find recovering an escaped terrorist easy, for he had years of survival training, and a whole lot more of conviction to fight it out for the sake of his faith.

And you thought hunting down a celebrity terrorist should be easier than hunting down a celebrity terrorist mastermind Osama. Apparently not, because Singapore isn't that small after all, unlike how 2 British tourists thought it was when they asked me for directions the other day.

He might have already made contact with his accomplices, in my opinion. I don't believe that he wouldn't expect himself to be captured since he was caught in Indonesia before. In organised terrorism, they would most probably have a plan in case he escaped, including where would he go in which his accomplices would take him in, since his accomplices will get free notification from MediaCorp, Straits Times, Lianhe Zaobao, maybe in CLEO right at the page after the 50 Most Eligible Bachelors if one of his accomplices is gay, and posters everywhere, even in my phone (Courtesy Singtel). Don't stereotype terrorists to be dumb just because some are suicide bombers.

Call 999 when you see him! But remember to call MediaCorp after that so they will come and interview and your face will be on TV.

You can be a celebrity too!

Tarot cards... it all came true

2008-03-01T04:54:00.005+08:00

I read my future through a deck of "Gay Tarots" that my friend bought, and every single fucking thing came true, while everything within the meanings in those cards are coming through one by one.

It is scary even, to see how fast things are happening, according to what was predicted and discerned through the cards that were read.

While I'm still trying to grapple at whether everything that has happened was just coincidence or real, I am not doing any tarot readings again. I'll rather not prepare for the future like this, but let reality unfold itself.

Arrival

2008-02-28T01:20:00.002+08:00

This post is hidden simply because I wanted to only let my friends that I allow to read about something that I will only discuss and reveal later, and also to put my feelings into words so that I could sort it out easily.

Please don't feel bad if I rejected you to read this when you ask for it. This time round, I don't want anything to happen just because I do not want the negativity to hit me when only friends I know understand this better than you do. Please do forgive me.

Another semester has ended

2008-02-25T10:23:00.002+08:00

"It's too fucking fast". Well, that was to simply put things. "Why?! 1 more year to graduation?", seemed to be much relevant. "Oh fuck! NS is coming", is the ultimate expression to being a male (gay and lazy) 2nd year (coming 3rd year) poly student.

I had so many resolutions for 2008, but I haven't had the motivation or time to accomplish them. Those resolutions leads to bigger things, which I guess is good, but yet by then I might have to much things to do to be able to juggle properly.

Besides, I only have a year left before I need to put everything I need to do to a rest, in preparation for NS.

I'm not really fearing about NS... it is just the feeling of being trapped somewhere, and losing things you have now.

Ahh well... I still have a year to think about so many things. Before that, maybe I should start somewhere in those resolutions, and make 2008 the perfect last year of enjoyment, work and play before the transition into NS and the workforce.

Singapore got to host YOG 2010

2008-02-21T19:19:00.004+08:00

Actually I just learnt today that the announcement date is today, and I didn't think at all that Singapore would lose the bid to Moscow - in which we did not! I was laughing away when they were playing the promotional video about the candidate cities, in which for Singapore, they played the Uniquely Singapore video (direct download link).

Don't they have a better video or at least a specially made video for this purpose? LOL. Moscow did have a special video very subtlety done.

But anyway, grats to Singapore for winning the bid, and finally we will no longer be called a little piece of booger, or a tiny red dot (when used mockingly).

BTW anyone seen Lee Hsien Loong's face on TV? He looked like he's going to cry, which I can understand. Ahh well.

The historic photo:

Official announcement on Olympics official website: http://www.olympic.org/uk/news/olympic_news/
full_story_uk.asp?id=2491
Related Site:
http://www.sgyoutholympics.com/2008/02/21/we-won/

How to tell the world you're gay on TV

2008-02-20T01:01:00.005+08:00

Cockroaches are powerful gaydars.

If that's not enough, express your love.

You can tell others to help you out yourself too!

This is crazy!

2008-02-19T22:58:00.003+08:00

[Caution: links below may link to porn, or in other words, content not suitable for minors or people that do not wish to see it. Continue only if you wish to. Don't say I didn't warn that it is explicit porn. Gotta put it up here because it's some funny crazy shit.]

Anyone remember the Smurfs? The little men in blue with white hats?

This is really some crazy fetish. I mean SERIOUSLY.

NSFW (PORN): http://www.redtube.com/8399

Watching this may cause you to ask a very normal question. "What? WTF? Seriously?!"

Surrounded by love

2008-02-18T16:23:00.004+08:00

The past week had been a lovely week, which coincidentally coincides with Valentines' Day: 14th Feb. Honestly though, before that I was faking it, asking my friends what's on Feb 14. Oh well...

Well it's not that I got a new date or anything, but I watched Juno last week and P.S. I Love You yesterday. Adding to that I attended a Valentines' Day forum held by Oogachaga called "A Shot at Love" (link). It was really insightful to hear others talk about their past, relationship dynamics, and dealing with being out of love. Very well organised and conducted, but yeah labels like "twinky boys" came up and some point... Haha I guess people can't really avoid using these labels can't they?

Juno was fantastic, just as critics said it was. The movie was rather slow paced, but it is the small details it paid attention to that developed emotions among audiences with the characters. Too bad that I heard it didn't really arouse interest among audiences because it wasn't exactly some Blockbuster movie.

P.S. I Love You got me thinking about a lot of things, and there are quite a few quotes in the movie that I loved a lot. Said by Patricia, Holly's mum, "So now, alone or not, you've got a walk ahead. Thing to remember is if we're all alone, then we're all together in that too". I guess that line applied to me well, and I guess it sort of re-energised me to face it, because not every lucky one can live comfortably with someone they love. This is one of those romance movies that I have no regret watching; it surprisingly makes you feel better whatever your current romantic circumstances may be.

There it concludes my few days of being surrounded by love. I guess these movies and programs can be packaged into some "recovery class for people on the rebound" or something. Haha. That will be great isn't it?

Was Ah Meng a forgotten gay icon?

2008-02-10T23:32:00.000+08:00

I think I have seen her quite a few times when I was small (having not visited the Zoo in years), and her life story almost sounded like the typical life story of an international gay icon.

Ah Meng (circa 18 June 1960 – 8 February 2008) (Chinese: 阿明) was a female Sumatran Orangutan and a tourism icon of Singapore. She was smuggled from Indonesia and kept illegally as a domestic pet before being recovered by a veterinarian in 1971. She was then eleven years old and was given a home at the Singapore Zoo.

Ah Meng was the head of her small clan, which lives in a large enclosure with about twenty other orangutans. She had five children and became a grandmother in 1990.

[...]

Ah Meng was the poster girl of the Singapore Zoo. Pictures of her have been used in Singapore's tourism advertisements worldwide. She has also been featured in over 30 travel films and more than 300 articles. Some of the foreign dignitaries and celebrities that visited Ah Meng included Prince Philip and Michael Jackson.

Retrieved from Wikipedia

Yep. Sounds like it.

If you don't really get why, compare it with Madonna's life story. The difference is huge, but similiar in ways of life process. Crisis > Opportunity > First Chances > Fame.

Quite amazing that 4000 people turned up for his memorial service, but her net worth in Singapore tourism cannot be compared with the amount of loss Singapore suffers without her.

Magnets

2008-02-08T01:39:00.001+08:00

This is a post about jealousy. It's gonna be damn emo, so to save you from the trauma, I'm gonna just summarise it.

Some people are like magnets. They don't have poles, and don't repel.

They just attract.

I hate it. I hate it.

I'm so negative lately. Gosh.

Ikuta Toma is straight

2008-02-06T21:16:00.000+08:00

It's not good news for fangirls, or fangayboys.

Fangirls are heartbroken and jealous that Toma-sama kissed another unknown girl (rumored to be Horikita Maki, a.k.a Mizuki in Hanazakari no Kimitachi e).

Fangayboys are heartbroken, jealous, and sad that the rumoured to be gay/bi Ikuta Toma is actually straight, and kisses another girl in a Purikura pic (a.k.a Neoprint).

I'm so over the "Dexter" scandal, or the "Edison Chen is a pimp with a small dick" scandal, but this scandal is small but hurtful.

Why..... =(... Haaunn...

I really hope this picture is not real. Gah!

I love Maki-chan so... please don't let that girl be her! Let it be some other girl that deserves to be kicked.

Mukyaaaa!!

LOL ok this post sounded childish but yeah, it is not a nice way to spend my Lunar New Year with this revelation.

Anyway, happy LNY and may you get lots of Ang Pao.

Ainori is so dramatic

2008-02-04T22:58:00.000+08:00

I just started following an extremely popular reality series in Japan, Ainori (あいのり), which started airing even before the mother of reality shows Survivor became popular in America. Really felt very slow and regretful to catch on with this show only now, because it is really dramatic and well produced.

This is the format of the show:

[...] Several young men and women travel around the world, mainly on a pink bus (The Love Wagon). The object of each member of the group is to fall in love (usually with another member, but there have been exceptions) and return to Japan as a couple. When one member decides to 'confess love' for another, they request a return-trip plan ticket from the Love Wagon driver (usually a native of the particular country they are currently in). They present this ticket to the object of their affection . Then, usually the next day, the person can either kiss the one who presented them the ticket (accept), and return to Japan together. Or decline, which means the 'confessor' returns to Japan alone, while the 'rejector' remains with the group. As people leave the group, new members are added to the program. They are seen on the side of the road with a painted cardboard sign (appearing to be hitchhikers) and brought aboard after a self-introduction. Members may also choose to 'retire' from the program (which is to return to Japan without confessing love for anyone).

Taken from D-Addicts Ainori subbing page

They are traveling in Germany right now, and man, Remi is a hard girl to please. I feel sad for Carbonara, and won't Ryou stop talking about Carbonara in front of Remi for a second? LOL. The new guy Seiji has some major issues, although he is so cute, handsome and with a yummilicous body. He's definitely a guy you can have sex but not a relationship with (the gay way of looking at things).

If you follow a lot of Japanese entertainment news, or Japanese stuff in general, you should have long known Ainori, or else, it is not too late to start. Really wonder if there's an Ainori fan-club in Singapore, because they were travelling in Singapore in 2003.

Of course, one of the plus points of this show is that Wentz Eiji is one of the hosts too. =D

It's a great show to catch, and I've got a friend hooked already. =)

Bittorrent is great, I would have missed out so many great shows without it.

Ainori torrents: http://d-addicts.com/forum/torrents.php?search=ainori
English subtitles: http://www.d-addicts.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=21282
Official website (Fuji Television): http://wwwz.fujitv.co.jp/ainori/index.html*

*Torrent downloads available are always slower than the show aired on TV in Japan (usually by 1 episode), therefore the official website will update faster than the last episode you have watched. So if you don't want to spoil the story in the next episode that you have not watched, avoid the chart, or Love Striker (恋ストライカー) in the official website.

Logic

2008-01-31T22:48:00.000+08:00

It's obvious, but I didn't quite realise it until now.

I'm a very logical person. I consider the possibility of success, existence, relevance, accuracy, and everything else before I head off to do something.

The real problem is that I tend to get too logical.

I can't seem to enjoy the fun side of irrelevance. I don't enjoy solving serious issues with serious consequences like it was up to yourself to make the choice that will be the last option on my list. Those choices that I would consider stupid, or even dumb.

On the other side, computers seem completely logical to me, because computers runs by logic, which it resembles my personality... somehow. When this came into mind, I realised that everything does have a connection, don't they? It shows even in your interests.

Although it's kinda scary that my personality resembles a cold, emotionless computer, I do know that it is not the case. My friends would know how emo I am... and I'm not going into details about that here.

I would say part of me is logical, and a part of me illogical. It seems that whenever I do emotional decisions involving myself, like love and relationships, I'm rather illogical. When I am suggesting solutions to others, I always consider the facts posted to me, and find the most logical solution with the most logical arguments of how that solution would work out.

So if you are looking for a solution to a problem that will most probably solve or lessen the problem, look for me. If you want to have some fun with the problem, and would rather have an illogical solution to an illogical problem, look for the 8-Ball.

Of course, normal and logical terms and conditions do apply. *** =)

How much?

2008-01-27T20:37:00.000+08:00

Something I did to get my heat off the matter:

Click on picture for a BIGGER view.

There are some things money can't buy, for everything else, procrastinate.

Receipt credit: felizlovinit.blogspot.com

Release

2008-01-26T23:34:00.000+08:00

Today's the release, after a 3-4 week crazy marathon with time. Projects in all modules, and a whole lot of human drama with the people I'm concerned with, worked with, and even acquaintances that just came out of the blue to bother me... somehow.

I spent the entire day at home, a feeling I really missed... getting in touch with my dramas, of which the last episode of Nodame Cantabile in Europe made me cry and yearn for a 2nd season.

Walking home from dinner, drinking my favorite "Chocolate Oreo Milk Tea", I felt so carefree, and rewarded. I noticed my pace of walking today was exceptionally slower than on other days. It made me realised that the past few weeks was the most lifeless time of my life.

Thinking back, I can just say that I felt like patting myself on the back saying, "Otsukare".

Still, thanks to Jon from Stages, I got a complimentary ticket for Chesty Nutty Bang Bang (Chestnuts in the previous years). It was a well needed laugh, with many credits to Bang Wenfu for the hilarious mixes he came up with. I wouldn't spoil it here, but for a first-timer that is listening to his works, it was mindblowing that anyone could think of something so unexpected. Yeo Yan Yan was exploding with talent on stage, and her character in the production was a surprising turn. Joakim too looked hilarious dancing on that "shiny pole", and I was rather impressed with his debut performance in theatre.

Looking at so many people overflowing with talent, makes me want to work harder and try out new things. I don't really feel I am in the right direction, as I am much more into working with new media types, and get really creative on those. Such things does rely on connections even if I had the talent.

Anyway, today's supposed to be a happy day. I should be happy that my school projects are all over. Although exams are coming my way, I shouldn't think about it as yet. Those assignments took everything out from me.

Finally, to all my friends, sorry to disappear again, but I think I will reappear next week only to disappear again the week after (exams). =)

So emo

2008-01-18T00:39:00.001+08:00

Today's not a very good day.

I was in school till 10pm just to rush up my assignment, in which I never did manage to complete it. It rained a little, and as I was walking through the school to the bus stop - the loneliness and creepy feeling was overwhelming.

I was on the bus, listening to a song by DBSK (Hello Again), and one of the verse said, "I feel happy when I see you" (Boku wa anata ni aete yokatta).

Somehow it lead me thinking about my relationship with my brother.

Then someone that I don't wish to hear from ever again just SMSed me, like as if nothing has happened between us.

Sounds so emo. Maybe I just had too much adrenaline boost today.

Gyaboo! Nodame in Europe!!

2008-01-14T15:37:00.000+08:00

Done by: Curry Puff, lah! on Flickr.

Mukyaaaa!!! I can't seem to calm down now!

I just watched the Nodame Cantabile in Europe special, and I think I can still feel the ache from laughing during the show! It was really that good.

It was really well needed, since I have just completed one big assignment today and was feeling stressed (few more to go). The show was so well produced, and even better than the 1st season! Although I just watched Lesson 1 of the show and I can't wait to watch the next, but I shall wait till the subs to come out.

I really love how they added new otakus into the show (Otaku: Japanese usage on people that have obsessive interests, most commonly used on anime and manga fans), which was basically like Nodame! Hahaha...

I am really really really happy but not too surprised when they I saw Wentz Eiji in the cast list before the special came out. He's really cute, funny, and good looking too!

Gyaaaaaaaa... I want to watch the second part!!

Sorry cabbies

2008-01-04T20:33:00.000+08:00

I don't usually ride taxis unless I am out late into the night on a weekday. On the weekends if I am out late, I will most probably be at Tanjong Pagar area (you should know why) after clubbing or drinking.

Tanjong Pagar area does not have any Night Rider (NR) or NightOwl (N) services, and I am adopting a new route to get home at those times ever since the fare hike like many many people do.

A recap:

City Area Surcharge: up from $1 to $3, effective 5pm and midnight from Mondays to Saturdays.

Late Night Surcharge: up from the staggered 10% to 50% current one, to the flat 50% extra for rides between 12 midnight to 5.59am daily.

Peak Period Surcharge: up from the $2 flat fee now in effect between 7am and 9.30am on weekdays and 5pm to 8pm from Mondays to Saturdays, to 35% of the metered fare.

Flag down fare: up by 30 cents from $2.50 to $2.80 for the first kilometre.

Distance fare: up from 10-cent jumps to 20-cent jumps.

Waiting time: up from 10 cents per 25 seconds to 20 cents per 45 seconds.

And an example:

"So if you call for a cab from the city, at 8pm on a Friday night, you are going to pay $10.30 even before the cab moves off ($3 City Area surcharge, $2.80 flag down, $3.50 call charge, $1 or 35% of metered fare for Peak Period surcharge)."

Source: Mrbrown.com

Which sounds rather ridiculous.

In other words, I am doing a circumstantial-based boycott for all taxi services, and doing a dramatical decrease in the frequency of myself staying out late during weekends (where neither NR or N buses operate).

I will usually take a cab down to Clark Quay MRT, and wait for a late-night bus service at that bus stop. Even then, the short trip down will cost $5+, which I will be sharing the cab with my friends. In the future, we might plan to walk down to take the bus.

Circumstances are different for everyone. You may not be able to boycott due to your work, income (if you are the filthy rich), or way of life. I know many companies are stopping reimbursements for their employees' cab fares, and suggest other means of transport. No matter what, I am because the fare hike will not benefit anyone - the cabbies nor the consumers.

We shan't put in high hopes that the boycott will work, because we do live in 2008 and that means a lot more lazy people are around - we aren't as united as we are back in the '80s where boycott REALLY do mean boycott. I am boycotting only for my pocket. If you are boycotting taxis too, good for you. If you are not, taxi drivers still needs to pay for their rent ranging from $60+ up to $100+ day, and will not be able to pay the minimum rent if no one rides them.

Then again, it's not really your business to care about their rent. Looking at the queue of taxis outside Takashimaya during peak hours, we had already won half the game.

To like minded people planning to continue boycott: Ganbatte kudasai.

New year, new plans

2008-01-03T13:38:00.001+08:00

It's great to be in the new year. 2008. Everything starts fresh, hopefully.

I have some new plans for the new year. Not everything will come true though, but I will work to make it happen.

1. My online portfolio

I originally planned this with a partner, but looks like he's heading for something greater. I figured maybe I should start to work on this myself. I have to devote time on this, but since it doesn't have a deadline, I can work whenever I'm free.

2. Blog migration

Since I have my own domain, I will most likely be moving my blog from here to that location, but it is risky if I ever decide to come back here... which I really can't guarantee. Should there be a year I can't manage to pay my hosting bills, that might just happen.

3. I'll add here when I think of them.

LOL. Gomen neh. I still can't think of anything else. =P

I want this!

2007-12-30T14:45:00.001+08:00

I know it's not very possible, but I really want this!

I am running out of space to keep my stuff: School work, dramas, personal stuff, work stuff, blah.

I know I am so geeky. Someone from HWZ said he/she got this for under $200 at FUWELL. Thread here: http://forums.hardwarezone.com.sg/showthread.php?
t=1797845. Although the enclosure is a brand unheard of, it doesn't really matter because the HD included is a silent Samsung 500GB 3.5" HD501LJ Spinpoint T166 Serial ATA! The enclosure is QUITE elegant lah. Thick silverish white aluminium, very Mac-ish.

I wonder how long I will need to save up to get this. I still have so many more things I need to settle.

Signs to note if you don't have a life

2007-12-28T21:09:00.000+08:00

Yea yea yea... I have not blogged for god knows how long. Well granted, if I am busy, I have a valid reason not to be able to blog. The fact is that I am so freeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!

So, to kill my boredom, here is a list of things people do when they just have too much time:

In reality, the drama only has 12 episodes. For you, there's 100 episodes, and counting.
You started to Google your ex-boyfriends' names, and spends the next 2 hours clicking through the links.
There's nothing in your email inbox, but you started reading all other old emails.
You started reading the spam mails.
You navigate to your blog and started to read about how you spent last Christmas.
You go back watching your 12 episode drama.
You start to wonder if anyone has poked you on Facebook in the last 5 minutes.
You go into a poking frenzy for the next 30 minutes.
You wonder if your ex-boyfriend has a Facebook account.
You Google your name.
You Appear Offline in MSN while looking through your contact list. Wanted to talk to someone but realised that you wanted to Appear Offline.
"I'm a geek" is your display message.
You started to think what will you do to kill time.
You realised that you just did.
You started compiling a list of what you will do to kill time.
You spent the next 30 minutes trying to come up with a list.
90% of the time is wasted on thinking of stuff to write.
You started to write similiar stuff.
You want to just hit 20 things bored people do.
And you did.

Thanks for the love

2007-12-10T16:27:00.000+08:00

Wow. Just realised that I have not blogged in the longest time. I will not try to come up with excuses this time, because I am just very lazy to report whatever I did on my blog. Same for people that uses Twitter... you guys amaze me.

There's quite a bit of people I want to thank for giving me a great time over the past few days, whatever you did, whatever you gave, however much of love you had let out, I deeply appreciate them. Thanks for making my birthday special.

Ok this is gonna get bit boring (like as in Oscar thanksgiving speech boring):

Thanks for bringing me to heaven before I die, Marcus and Pris... The Häagen-Dazs Fondue was just... OMG. It's better than sex - this should be the tagline for the Fondue. Thanks also for the dinner, and the good time we had that day.

Suk Wai, thanks for the card. Too bad we didn't get to go to Megabites, but it was ok because what happened that day was tragic enough already. Pei Sian, thanks for cheering up a bit and your birthday wish. Devi, thanks to you too.

Thanks to Nicholas, Ian, Jay, Emeric, Yangfa for the boys night out. I was so shocked, surprised but really touched when all of you showed up in striped shirts in honour of me? LOL. I was a tad bit embarassed at first, because I didn't wear my striped shirt that day! Thanks everyone for showing up. I really like the gifts very much. Thanks for the thumbdrive... 4GB! It was really so smart that you guys actually thought of studding the thumbdrive with crystals. Fabulous stuff. Ian thanks for almost digging your eyes out just to stud the thumbdrive. (Yes I might just be able to cruise using this *bling bling*)

Finally, thanks to everyone that SMSed to wish me. The other Jasper, Shu Fang, Nan and Jeremy. I hope I didn't leave anyone out?

No thanks to Yee for forgetting. Hehe... Kidding lah. =P

Thanks also to Nan for letting me picture with her dog leash. And no I'm not exactly into BDSM. =)

Falling apart

2007-11-29T14:19:00.000+08:00

I feel strange nowadays.

Everyone around me seemed to be falling apart, while I think I am the only one that is normal, sustaining healthily through life. Close, relatively close, distant - everyone.

I know that problems happen to people all the time, but why must all the worse problems happen to the people around me at the same time?

It's hard for me not to realise that anything more that happen to others could drag me into depression too. Life is really amazing... amazingly unpredictable.

Everything is happening so fast. I am trying my best to obstruct them from affecting me, because I hope that at least, while some of my friends are down, I could still be there, sane enough to lend a hand, or maybe just my ears.

I chose to think that I am quite messed up myself, yet, why does everyone else exhibit a greater vulnerability to existing or new circumstances than I do?

Well yeah, I hope that everyone can get over the horrible things that they are going through. A smile from you will be the greatest reward I can ever get.

I'm on Facebook, too

2007-11-27T09:19:00.000+08:00

I am puzzled on why I am only on Facebook now, because I'm one of the geeky ones that will jump on anything new and fresh online. I've heard about it for a long time, how successful it is, and how it is the next Google, where Google will be the next Microsoft.

Anyways.

My profile is linked here: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=753720797

Yep and basically that's it for this post, unless you still wanted to know more.

In that case you could email me. :)

Turning 19

2007-11-19T11:01:00.001+08:00

Time flies so fast man. I'm in the second semester of my year 2 life, and going to be 19 soon this December... and I'm one of the older one in class.

Still remember that I was actually quite excited of my 18th birthday. The feeling is like I am being freed from a child's body, into young-adulthood. I know it sounds strange but yeah, that's how I felt.

I don't know why I suddenly feel like playing MapleStory out of a sudden. Hahaha maybe trying to hide my age.

Anyway, school had been so busy with a lot of assignments, tests, and practicals. Everyday's a busy day.

Yeah I know that's me acting cute.

Gullibility and greed

2007-11-11T04:19:00.000+08:00

It's fun when you see gullible and greedy people re-posting this kind of obvious scam chain letter, which kinda does to the same effect as writing a book that millions of people now believe in, if you got what I am trying to get at.

One of my ex-church friend sent me this scam chain letter on Friendster, which I thought was amazingly inspiring (considering who sent it), and a little funny for IT geeks, where it appears to be deeply tragic that a little mathematics and common sense fail them at the same time, not to say that I am extremely good in maths or what not.

----------------------------------
Original message from B***on:
----------------------------------
Original message from NJ:
----------------------------------
Original message from L**Y:
----------------------------------
Original message from S***IB:
----------------------------------
Original message from A RoCK StAR:
----------------------------------
Original message from x MiSsY a***n x:
Original message from Mich**le:
Friends, I am doing this for I need money to buy you christmas gifts. :)

This was on the 9:00 clock news the other night and this works THIS TOOK TWO PAGES OF THE TUES! DAY USA TODAY - IT IS FOR REAL.PLEEEEEEASE READ!!!! it was on the news! This thing is for real. Rest assured AOL and Intel will follow through with their promises for fear of facing a multimillion-dollar class action suit similar to the one filed by PepsiCo against General Electric not too long ago.

Dear Friends; Please do not take this for a junk letter. Bill Gates sharing his fortune. If you ignore this, You will repent later. Microsoft and AOL are now the largest Internet companies and in an effort to make sure that Internet Explorer remains the most widely used program, Microsoft and AOL are running an e-mail beta test.

When you forward this e-mail to friends, Microsoft can and will track it (If you are a Microsoft Windows user)? For a two weeks time period.

For every person that you forward this e-mail to, Microsoft will pay you $245.00 For every person that you sent it to that forwards it on, Microsoft will pay you $243.00 and ! for every third person that receives it, You will be paid $241.00. Within two weeks, Microsoft will contact you for your address and then send you a check.

Regards
Charles S Bailey General Manager Field Operations
Ext. 1085 or or RNX

I thought this was a scam myself, But two weeks after receiving this e-mail and forwarding it on. Microsoft contacted me for my address and within days, I receive a check for $24, 800.00. You need to respond before the beta testing is over. If anyone can afford this, Bill gates is the man.

Its all marketing expense to him. Please forward this to as many people as possible. You are bound to get at least $10,000.

Names have been edited to protect them from being potential Nigerian scam victims.

Wow, must be some intelligent (and expensive) marketing department Bill Gates is hiring. I wonder if it ever occurred to multi-billionaire Mr Gates that it might be cheaper distributing CDs that wipes out other web browsers after inserting, for the fact that Internet Explorer comes compulsorily and permanently installed with every Windows purchase. Or simply TV advertisements (like hello?).

And with all these gullible people around that are still stuck to the damned Internet Explorer, no wonder people like Bill Gates are smiling from ear to ear.

Nothing to do

2007-11-05T10:43:00.000+08:00

I'm rarely free these days, because I have piling practicals in school everyday. I am quite free yesterday though, and I don't really know why I installed Maplestory and started playing using my old account.

Cute right? Haha. It's actually a Lv. 28 Mage. Yesterday I sort of chionged, because I died so many times. I wasn't very sure of the controls after not playing for so long, and yeah, I died at least like 5 times lah.

Siaoz. Anyway I think I'm siao this days.

Why am I writing in Singlish? I don't know the reason I'm typing this post to begin with.

Oh ya! Maybe if you see me in Maple, can gimme free stuff! I'm in Aquila, and my Nick is "CutesyCat". I know it's a bit act cute lah (what's in a name? LOL), but hey, I am not ashamed to say that I think I'm cute.

My friend is laughing. GAH.

Thio Li-Ann

2007-10-24T13:17:00.000+08:00

This is quite funny: http://mrsbudak.livejournal.com/298891.html

I wonder what will REALLY happen if her neighbor's male cat really humps her male cat. She may want to suggest criminalization of ill disciple of house pets on pet owners as it may lead to further social moral decay, and advocating herself in SPCA's deviant sexuality treatment division.

And oh yeah, the whole slippery-slope argument had already gone out of fashion in debate circles.

Here's her NUS profile BTW: http://law.nus.edu.sg/faculty/staff/
profileview.asp?UserID=lawtla. Notice the contradiction when she list "International Human Rights Law & the Rights of Peoples" as one of her research interest.

What have I done?

2007-10-22T19:36:00.000+08:00

I just found out that a close friend of mine went into an ex-gay church, most likely "Choices" by Church of Our Savour.

I'm at a loss right now. What have I done? I should have realised the hints when he told me that he is severing all his ties with all his friends, including me. It is required by Choices for any ex-gay converts to sever all ties with all their friends, gay or straight ones, and accept therapy through Bible study classes and church activities.

I really should have detected it when he told me he wanted to end our friendship - politely.

I don't know what to do now.

It's terrible... how can anyone do this? Cutting friendship ties just to "get cured" of homosexuality when it's just a non-existent illness? What the fuck?

Christianity has already taken so much from me... and now it wants to take away my friends too?

I don't know... I just feel that if no one stands up for whatever shit that is happening at Choices, more people are going to go there, and face a life of denial, where in reality, they are suffering so much more, suppressing their own sexuality just to fit into that perfectly insignificant Bible of yours.

I am so mad right now. How much more harm can you cause to this person by taking away all his friends? It's like a brainwash, because I bet many people have memories with the good friends they have been with, and it is all these good memories that makes up their past. NO ONE can change their past isn't it? And now you are forcing him to forget who he was too?

I hate you. Whoever whom had done this to him. You have no idea what he had been through, and it's all oh-so-easy to offer him Jesus as the way, when you have absolutely no idea about his past, and asked him furthermore to cast all his friends he had for the past 19 years out of his life? You fucking bastards just fail to realise how much we hate what you are doing - tearing people apart, doing every single thing you can just to fulfill your zealousness, accompanied by your own foolishness and naive mindset to even realise how much harm you are bringing upon my friend and whomever that is going through this shit with him.

If ever God made a mistake, that mistake must be you.

Love gays, hate their agenda

2007-10-22T18:29:00.000+08:00

Quoted from: http://pro377a.livejournal.com/601.html

This blog contributes to the debate about whether gay sex should be legalized in Singapore. It is the stance of this blogger that gay sex should never be allowed to become legal.

Already, each time I type the words "gay sex," I feel sinful, firstly for thinking about sex, and secondly for thinking about gay sex in particular (which makes me doubly sinful). It is my belief that all unholy thoughts of sex lead to sin and sin in turn leads to spiritual death. Thus, this already shows that gays and gay activists are poisoning our minds with their call for a repeal of 377A. They know very well that the unerring government will not accede to their atrocious demand, but they have a hidden agenda knowing that their cause is lost. That is the agenda of poisoning our thoughts with thoughts of gay sex. When the devil knew that he could never win God, he, too, resorted to poisoning the thoughts of people with lies. Similarly, gays are fighting their losing battle by poisoning the minds of people through websites, blogs and even forum letters. They capitalize on Singapore's democracy and free press to further their agenda.

It goes without saying that if gays are allowed to continue unhindered, then Singapore will degenerate into a nation whose people are filled with thoughts of one man gently caressing another, of one man kissing another, one man masturbating another and one man inserting his organ of procreation into other men's organs of excretion. What's wrong with that? It is not merely abnormal or a matter of going against the order of nature. It is a parody of the sacred union of man, woman and God. And what has this got to do with legalizing it or not? Firstly, we have to criminalize acts that are clearly wrong. Secondly, we have to stop the parody before it gets out of hand (no pun intended). If we do not stop gays, they will carry their parody out from the bedroom (or cars or toilet cubicles) to the public by insisting on their right to marry. It is already bad enough if they sin privately. It is much worse if they carry their parody to the public domain and start to gain acceptance. Clearly, banning gay sex is not solely a matter of denying gays their carnal, hedonistic pleasures. It is a matter preventing gays from subverting the sacred institution of marriage. If we ever allow gays to get marry, given their promiscuous nature, they will likely divorce, especially because they cannot have children and should never be allowed to adopt. (Why allow an orphan to grow up in a fake family learning to accept gays when they can grow up in a proper, functional family learning the right religious and social values that will perpetuate our current way of life?)

Do not get me wrong. I have nothing against gay people. I am only against gay sex and homosexuality. So-called "gay" people can change and, indeed, many have. "Gay" men are actually not really gay. It is just that they think they are gay when they really are not deep inside them. Homosexuality doesn't really exist as a part of our latent impulses. It is just one of the many manifestations of unholy behavior. But unlike other manifestations of unholy behavior, this particular manifestation has the potential to give the transgressor enough pleasure to continue. The transgressive act simulates the pleasure normal people have from healthy, heterosexual sex leading to procreation. The difference is that the physical pleasure can be duplicated but the spiritual pleasure can never be duplicated because these people are unholy just by virtue of the very act of transgression.

So, as I said, I'm not against gay people. I have a responsibility to love them. And because I love them, I have to be strict with them. I love my 35 children and I will not hesitate to cane them and leave the marks on their hands and legs to shame them because it's for their good. Love comes together with laborious discipline. This is why I am terribly disappointed by the government's relative inaction despite the existence of 377A. Why aren't more gays arrested, caned and jailed? If the government has been willing to do that, we would not be facing so many problems from misguided gay activists today. If they are all in jail nursing the painful strokes of the cane, they would have the space of reflect on their sins and repent. The problem of rampant homosexuality wouldn't be so serious today had the government been able to take action against gays.

I used to have a dog at home but I realized to my horror that it was becoming excessively intimate with other male dogs whenever it was allowed to go outdoors. I must have been too lax with Toby. Homosexuality had penetrated my household! This is my confession. Because I was careless, I had allowed sin to creep into my house stealthily. But I took immediate action. I locked Toby up and caned it. I brought home a pretty female dog to be his companion. I tried to get Toby to be "friendly" with Mandy. Each time it was friendly with Mandy, I would reward it with good food. Eventually, Mandy was impregnated through artificial insemination and now Toby and Mandy are living happily with their 12 puppies. I managed to convert my gay dog into a straight dog and cleanse my house of the terrible sin of homosexuality.

Brothers and sisters, in this decadent age, none of us is immune to the penetration of sin into our households or into our beings. But we can actively strive to be holy and do what is right. We have to love gays, but we cannot let our sympathy get the better of us. True love is the ability to discipline. If you claim to love homosexuals but refuse to jail and cane them, then you are being a hypocrite!

Let us end with one determination. Our thoughts have inevitably strayed from holy thoughts to thoughts about gay sex. It is inevitable but we still have to cleanse our minds. May we be determined to rid homosexuals from our thoughts. Brothers, don't be deceived by the seeming beauty of a taut male body with rippling muscles. Sisters, do not be deceived by the seeming beauty of a slender female body with soft, round breasts. Fill your minds with holy thoughts. Think of LOVE and how you can discipline those you love and bring them to the right path. Think, for instance, of the people here: http://repeal377a.com/

--------
My comments:
These people scare me. Although I don't think I am going to back down on this fight against 377A, these religious people show violent tendencies, even suggesting torture in order to let people that don't even subscribe to their beliefs to be in line with what the Bible wrote, if that was even close to what Jesus would have did anyway.

Think about it. Jesus got tortured and crucified on the cross. Did the priests accomplish anything great as according to their original wish: that Jesus is not the Son of Man and deserves death? What makes you think that torture is the best way to change or resolve anything that you are unfamiliar of? The priests didn't even know that Jesus was the Son of God! If anyone tells me that the writer is only quoting examples, I believe he has to be accountable for what he wrote as it suggests very much to me that he thinks violence and torture can be considered as a way to modify one's sexual orientation.

Yes you heard it right. Torture and violence here in the 21st Century.

I think someone should call SPCA and get this guy arrested.

More examples of violent religious nutcases? Try here:
http://enshrine377a.blogspot.com/2007/10/
walk-for-jesus-action.html

Gay law news coverage

2007-10-20T11:26:00.001+08:00

I've been quite busy recently, because school has just started. Still, apart from all the work, press and media coverage over the repeal of 377A is so loud to even ignore.

You have heard of repeal377A.com, and I'm sure keep377A.com too. With all this debate going on, and "The Majority" going all emotional about this issue, it makes it very easy for the laymen to see which side produces neutral and clear cut opinions, with God often brought up in the keep 377A petition.

There is no doubt that we cannot deny that they are an extremely vocal crowd, although they called us a vocal minority too. One of my favourite comments from keep377A.com is this: "God made them Man and yet... Just like God made Woman and told her to obey Adam and Adam listened to her instead : Instant Sin."

They never fail to spot another chance to exercise misogyny don't they? Oh the irony.

Still it is good that the media coverage on the gay issue is at its strongest ever, although many see no hope in getting the government to retract back their decision of not repealing the code anytime soon. We are getting the media interested in equality rights, well... that's a good change for a start.

And to think that keep377A.com did provide us a good place to laugh off at idiotic comments, well... not so bad to know that the knee-jerk reaction from the conservative crowd can be helpful to repeal377A.com in showing the thin line separating intelligence with shallowness.

We all know the religious leaders can influence their members to sign the petition, because they convey words from God through human interpretation of God's word as written by Man in the Bible. They signed it through a herd-mentality that's largely frowned upon in the Bible, although most would deny it, saying their support for the no-repeal of the penal code is because they uphold pro-family values, signing off with a relevant Bible verse that "they think" is relevant.

Oh, what to do.

Act NOW: Repeal gay sex law

2007-10-12T17:51:00.000+08:00

Even celebrities are voicing out and doing their part by coming up with a rap video pushing the repeal of the gay sex law.

Celebrities include Pamela Oei, Selena Tan, Emma Yong of the Dimsum Dollies, 881 star Yeo Yann Yann, Irene Ang, Tan Kheng Hua, Neo Swee Lin, Lim Kay Siu, Mark Richmond, Beatrice Chia, Glen Goei, Kumar, Robin Goh and Electrico’s Dave Tan.

Section 377A of the Singapore Penal Code currently prohibits any "indecent" acts between 2 men, effectively making this the gay sex law of Singapore which has already been taken down from many other countries.

Do your part by just 3 simple steps. Visit http://www.repeal377a.com for more details.

The internet is so slow...

2007-10-10T23:13:00.000+08:00

Is it just me, or is the internet connection today really really sluggish? I've just fixed up a new router in place of my old one (thanks to free routers from Singtel), and I hope it is not the router that is causing trouble.

He's sizzling

2007-10-06T21:02:00.000+08:00

One of my darkest secrets is that I think Justin Timberlake is to die for. I think every man will secretly want to have sex with him. Mmmm... =P

Repeal 377A: You don't have much time left

2007-10-05T14:05:00.000+08:00

If you believe that freedom should be given to every single Singapore citizen, regardless of their sexual orientation (gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered, or confused), show your support by signing the open letter to Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong to repeal 377A before 19 October, 2007.

Click on the banner above to sign.

No, we don't need your IC number. What we need really is a joint effort to eradicate unfair criminal laws that are targetted towards a minority with no valid basis at all.

If you are thinking now that this does not involve you, you may wait till the conservatives do something to further criminalise us, or even further influence the government to impose no-warrant arrest orders for all homosexuals in the country. That's the time that you will only do something, isn't it?

Blogging myself

2007-10-02T21:31:00.000+08:00

I have so many things I want to say... but I didn't want too many people to know too much about me nowadays.

Online, that is.

I still tell most of my stuff to my friends... but I felt that the matters close to me are still better not to be disclosed too publicly online. It might explain why I am blogging this little nowadays.

Actually, I am a person that likes to share. I like to tell things that concerns me to my friends, and pretty much nothing in the world can I not talk about. I am just not too comfortable to be blogging my feelings anymore, much less how I used to be blogging actively, humor inclusive.

It's really a complicated feeling. I might use to say that blogging to me is a form of expression, but it scares me sometimes when some people I've only met once or twice, or even those that we've never met, comes up to me and said they read my blog, even remembering what I wrote. It's like I have lost freedom. I can be held accountable for whatever I write here, defeating the purpose of this blog I started out with: freedom of expression.

It's scary how easy it is for anyone to find out more about me. Just google my name.

I started out this blog as a trial... something like experimenting with new technology. I then realised that I can "talk it out" on my blog, feeling better afterwards. Of course, I rant sometimes (in fact most of the time).

I lost that kind of feeling. I forgot how I used to feel better after writing it out publicly. I don't feel better at all after writing it all out. Or should I say that I felt better, but ultimately, I realised that blogging did not solve the problem as it is still there. It goes back to the starting point again.

I am not what I am now when I am younger. Back then I don't know how to express myself, because a lot of things that I want to express, I couldn't. I am a very, very quiet boy... much quieter than I am now. I just hide it inside. That only changed after I came out.

I guess I am going back to that point again when I was young... just that this time round, I am closing up to anyone that reads my blog online.

However, it's not the end of the road for this blog. My blog will still be here. I will still be blogging on this blog. The contents are not changing too much. You will still see contents like activism, interesting links, interesting stuff that happened to me, how I am improving my relationship with my parents... whatever. Just less of my feelings.

Okay maybe my blog isn't gonna change alot, but closing some part of myself to the online crowd is definitely a yes.

This is too funny

2007-09-26T16:29:00.000+08:00

[via Digg]

Just one of those times that I see something yet not know how to comment on it.

The ignorance is appalling.

Losing a friend

2007-09-24T22:54:00.000+08:00

Since you were off, I wished you all the best in National Service. I really treasure our friendship, and knowing you was a great pleasure.

Today, you made a choice. You said you chose you forget me, because you wanted to forget about your past. Agreed, it is a painful past that you have had, and your story may be one of those that I will carry and remember throughout my entire life.

You SMSed me that you chose to forget me, and I shall not be hoping too much that you will read this either, since you wanted to forget me.

Whatever it is, I'm wishing you all the best. I sincerely hope that this phase that you are going through; in search of a renewed life, will turn out fruitful, and that you will be able to forget about the pains you've gone through.

Be on your way. Just remember you will always have my support.

Love,
Jasper

The Lees aren't that bad afterall

2007-09-23T23:42:00.000+08:00

At the beginning, I thought the problem is "a personal matter".

It is, however, in a different way. I always thought that the reason why 377A of the penal code always meet road blocks is that the Lees are homophobic too.

The way I see it now, things are certainly changing.

Both Lee Kuan Yew and Lee Hsien Loong had both recently commented that they believe homosexuality is "mostly inborn", and that the government always go with the flow of society, as they believe that the society are mostly "comfortable with [their] position" of leaving 377A "alone" in the penal code.

I will drop 2 arguments:
1. Gays and lesbians represent a large community of at least 8% of the total population, and therefore possesses a large voting power. Change of opinion may be fueled by this reason.
2. Opinions are changing, and the higher powers in the government are hinting us (queer community) to do something to help the government get rid of 377A, because only the power of creditable statistics can outweigh powerful religious opposition getting in the way of gay liberalisation.

Opposition exists when the government wants to setup Integrated Resorts (IR). Why was it passed then? Clearly, economic benefits are vital to Singapore, and using the IR is one good way to strike a many-fold return. The benefits became such a clear indication for the government to argue its way out of opposition.

I will not say that its hard for the government to argue the immediate benefits of gay liberalisation. It's tough to argue that this is a human right, for the religious opposition don't even recognise this as a right. We should be put to death in biblical times.

I can see gay liberalisation taking place in Singapore within my lifetime, and you should too. Whatever made the government take the stand that homosexuality is "mostly inborn" does not matter. They said it, and should be accountable for it.

What we need now is to unite the community. Sadly, a lot of people in the community don't even care. All they do is to tell us that we are doing a great job in gay activism, but doesn't really care if the government considers them as a criminal or not. They get their sex, clubs, drinks and income; that's all they care about.

Do something. Imagine the possibilities opening up for us if 377A is repealed: MDA will not be so uptight about censorship of gay content, we may get the equal employment opportunities law to include sexuality, and double-standards may get lifted in the army too. Much more things can be changed, only IF you do something.

If the entire community can unite to do a signed petition for the repealing of 377A for at least half the population of Singapore, and present that to the government, I do believe change can happen. Sure, the opposition can come out with their own petition to criminalise homosexuality, but should that stop us?

My idea is a huge one. How do you get half the population of Singapore sign a petition? It will take years, if not centuries to get it all done. Even the countries that have repealed the anti-gay sex law do not have to go through such lengths to get it done.

But if you believe that change can happen, it will.

If only I was this talented

2007-09-20T16:43:00.000+08:00

This guy can draw birds out of balls, man out of cocks, and boys out of virgina?

I am a criminal

2007-09-19T15:52:00.000+08:00

Or at least that's what the Singapore Government says to people like me that are contributing equally to society and economy.

Except for the law abiding part, and the pro-creation part... Now I don't think I'm very law abiding, am I?

I don't steal, fight, kill, cheat, harassed others or has violated any clause in the Maintenance of Religious Harmony Act (Chapter 167A) unlike some people whom had most probably done so without being prosecuted.

I'm gay.

According to the proposed amendments to the penal code after the first parliamentary reading on 17 September 2007 (published by the Ministry of Home Affairs), proposed changes to the law governing restriction of "gross indecency" between gays (Section 377A) has not only gone unamended, but "suffered double insult" as the law sits in between proposed laws against necrophilia and bestiality.

Whatever huge sinful act had we done to be held up as criminals, and be damned even till death?

I'm not quite getting it here. A citizen that contributes to the wealth and economy of Singapore, and is part of a minority group seemingly far larger than 2% of the population, constituting about 89,600 of the population (based on 2% estimate), yet all of them had been categorised as citizens with unconfessed criminal offences. The numbers quoted above is an extremely conservative estimate, unlike published estimates on demographics of sexual orientation that indicates more than 8% of a population may have attractions towards the same sex.

Religion is an issue that is inescapable, since the government and conservative religious organisations had been voicing opposition to the penal code's amendment, based on arguments that the proposed amendment are conflicting with their beliefs. Christianity, Catholicism, Islam and Sikhism forms a large group of people voicing out against homosexuality, but not all views are united. Views on this matter are further divided in Hinduism, since some believe that a variation in gender types and sexual orientation are considered to be "holy". Part of ancient Hinduism belief is that gender-variants will be the "pure of heart and tongue" -SQ21, Shelia Rajamanikam, page 178, line 15. However, such beliefs are not popular in the Singapore Hinduism culture.

Taking into account statistics of religious demographics in Singapore published in 2000, 14.6% of the population are Christians, 14.9% are Muslims, 4% are Hindu, and 0.39% are Sikhs. That forms 33.89% of the population that are supposedly against homosexuality, not taking into account that views on the matter are divided within these religious groups, affirming or opposing.

33.89% is too troublesome to type. Let's round up it shall we? 33.9%? No... We can round up it further. Let's say 34% are the "conservative majority".

Buddhism and Taoism were however, much more vague in matters dealing with homosexuality. Practitioners in different places believe in different spiritual regulations for or against homosexuality. However, unlike Christianity or Islam's deep motivation for evangelism and ex-gay ministries, as "commanded" in Biblical texts, Buddhism draws the line well between applying such spiritual regulations to practitioners of Buddhism only, and not applying them to the unbelievers. In the case of unbelievers, Buddhism emphasises on the need to embrace people that are different, promoting human rights over Buddhist scriptures. Taoism, on the other hand believes in the Yin and Yang energies, for in this case a gay couple would be a yang on yang, opposing the foundations of Taoism. Yet, Taoism scriptures do not explicitly forbid homosexuality.

Buddhism forms 42.5% of the population, and Taoism 8.5%. In total, 51% of the population are somewhat gay-tolerant (noting that 8.5% of the number is a grey area in the case of Taoism). I said only somewhat gay-tolerant. Personal opinions cannot be calculated, and therefore, similiar to the opposing religions of homosexuality, one belonging to this group may also be an opposition to homosexuality due to difference in beliefs or personal views.

But comparing 34% of the opposing voices (with divided views) to 51% of supporting voices (again with divided views), don't you think it's laughable that the opposing don't even form half of the population, while Buddhism alone had far exceeded the number of believers in the opposing voices? What makes anyone think Christianity is more tolerant than Buddhism with explicit mention of homosexuality as a sin in the Bible?

That is why I believe that categorising the opposing voices as a significant minority is more than appropriate.

Don't you find that 2%, or 89,600 people do form a significant minority too? So, why are our voices being ignored, out-shined by another significant minority, and gain no recognition at all?

The government has always quoted "Asian values" and a "conservative majority" as the primary reason why Section 377A of the penal code is here to stay. What are those "Asian values"? I always hear about them, but have there been any elaborate written documentation of "Asian values" like how the law does, further approved for ISO-certification or something? What are those values?

The values are divided, I would say. Who determines what is a morally right conduct? Loving someone of the same sex wrong? Expressing love through sex wrong? What is right, and what is wrong?

Conservative majority? What conservative majority? 34% of a conservative significant minority it is.

One may argue that personal opinions on the matter can always differ, but if a certain portion of the claim can be proved using statistics, that the "anti-gay majority" is indeed just a significant minority, how much variation will we be expecting that some individuals have opinions that are similiar or contrary to their religious values?

If my friends and I, age ranging from 18 to 25, can already see the big picture in this matter, I don't see how the entire government chose to look elsewhere for answers.

If you noticed, I didn't even add the non-religious group of the population (which forms 14.6% of the population). 14.6% of divided views, ungoverned by any religious beliefs. What tells the government that most of these people are conservative too, when they believe in nothing?

If gays can procreate and produce geniuses that will be future millionaires, I think the government will not hesitate to decriminalise homosexuality. So much for equal human rights for everyone.

2008 Men On A Mission Calendar

2007-09-16T21:47:00.000+08:00

[via Lancerlord]

What can be more wrong than this?

Video link [Youtube]
Official Myspace page: http://myspace.com/menonamissioncalendar
Official website: http://mormonsexposed.com/

I'd love to buy one and have one of them preach to me!

Eiji Wentz in underwear commercial

2007-09-16T21:40:00.000+08:00

Damn sexy.

I like his underwear already.

Letter to Raffles Institution regarding Otto Fong

2007-09-11T03:40:00.000+08:00

Subject: Qualities teachers should have: Otto Fong

To whomever it may concern,

I am writing in support of Otto Fong, one of your colleagues whom had recently came out on his personal blog, but only to have deleted the posts under pressure from the ministry.

Personally, I am a student currently pursuing my diploma in Information Technology in Ngee Ann Polytechnic. I am openly gay, and I am one of the founding members of Plume.sg, a GLBT support group for teenagers below 25 seeking a safe environment to explore and reconciliate their sexuality and their struggles as a gay person.

I must say that I am deeply touched by Mr Fong's article. It really reminds me of my secondary school days, facing attraction towards the same sex, yet without peers I can share this new and alien experience with, much less teachers or authority figures that could most probably guide me. It was frightening, because I never knew that there are other people just like me, thinking that it's just me alone experiencing such attractions towards my own gender - something that is not accepted by the society at large.

I know that this is a difficult issue to tackle, since many conservative parents would most likely target the ministry for a reason of why a gay teacher is in the teaching profession, "corrupting" their kids with the wrong values of homosexuality. Well, my take will be that it doesn't seem that their kids would grow taller if he hanged around their tall friends. I don't personally blame the ministry or the school for the actions taken, but I believe it is about time the ministry accepts that there will always be homosexuals in the teaching profession - just like any other profession. If the pressure are constantly coming from the conservatives, I would think that they would want us out of Singapore, let alone seeking employment here. There is no point to stop someone with such passion to teach from doing a great job just because of his sexuality.

I would believe that the school will have a group of gay students that are also seeking a teacher that could guide them: something I've always yearned for back then, so that I will not be pressurised by my peers, or other factors due to the harsh homophobic climate we have in the education ministry. Many gay and lesbian teens would want to seek help - as many of my personal gay friends had once lanced into depression or thoughts of suicide just because they were different and couldn't fit into the straight environment in school, with people calling them names like "queers".

Lastly, I hope that the school can continue to use such a great teacher in your teaching team, for his sexuality is no reason one should judge him for, as he is still someone that is passionate about teaching.

Thank you for your time.

Jasper Chen

****************************

Letters of support should go to Bob Koh (headmaster@ri.sch.edu.sg), headmaster of Raffles Institution.

****************************

You may read more about it here (don't miss the comments):

theonlinecitizen - TOC Exclusive: Otto Fong’s Open Letter

Fridae.com - singapore teacher removes coming out blog under ministry pressure

****************************

I am also quoted in a New Paper article:

Read more about it here: http://newpaper.asia1.com.sg/printfriendly/
0,4139,141783,00.html

Marié Digby - Crazily Addictive

2007-09-09T22:14:00.000+08:00

Rihanna, sorry but you sold sex. Marié Digby, bravo: Your voice is crazily addictive. She nailed this song more than Rihanna did.

This is her album single version sold exclusively only on iTunes:

881: You cannot miss this!

2007-08-31T02:07:00.001+08:00

You know it's a good film when you see my parents, whom have never stepped into a cinema for the last 10 years or so, go watch the film by themselves, paying what they conceive as overpriced tickets.

I'm in the cinema. It's the 3rd week it's showing, and it's a 9:30PM show. The cinema was packed even then.

I had never cried in a film before. Call me cold hearted, but most of the time I can control my tears.

I cried buckets for this one, and ended up looking like an alien with red eyes when I left the cinema.

...and Qi Yu Wu was hot. =)

I'm 78% Megatron

2007-08-16T15:17:00.000+08:00

I AM
78%
MEGATRON Take the Transformers Quiz

Megatron is the leader of the Decepticons. He will stop at nothing to establish his empire and destroy the Autobots, starting with Optimus Prime.

Like Megatron, you are not compassionate and harbor evil thoughts. You are inspiring, confident, and a natural leader. The Decepticons have chosen well. In addition, you enjoy being one step ahead of your friends as far as trends and technology.

And I think that makes me evil hahaha!

Original Hanazakari no Kimitachi e

2007-08-14T02:14:00.000+08:00

This is something worth catching: This is Japan's adaptation of "Hanazakari no Kimitachi e", done previously by Taiwan as 《花样少年少女》, popularly known as Hana-Kimi. 《花ざかりの君たちへ》, also 《偷偷爱着你》, is another adaptation of the comic, although I do not know if this version sticks more accurately to the original plot in the comic since this is a Japan adaptation. There are a total of 23 volumes in that comic, but I think there are 11 episodes all in all.

Why watch this when you have already watched the Taiwan version? Well, looking at the photo above, you might just figure out why I am watching it. =P

The plot is quite different in its own way as I could tell (cuz you wouldn't wanna know how many times I re-watched the Taiwan version). But, the basic storyline and names still sticks to the ones you've already heard of, so it's not too hard identifying the characters.

Still, it's funny, with a change: lots more guys to drool after.

FUJI Television site: http://wwwz.fujitv.co.jp/hanakimi/index.html

Mother Don't Allow

2007-08-07T23:52:00.000+08:00

Mother Don't Allow (MDA) me to see so many things! Like an exhibition of same sex kissing she don't allow. Discuss about sexual laws discriminating against homosexuals she don't allow. She don't allow people to see a piece of art (sketches) depicting lesbian sex. She don't allow me to see art documentary by award winning Israeli filmmaker. She also don't allow me to hear a healthy talk by a gay pastor.

My mother also go and tell other people not to allow people to go to Botanic Gardens, a public place, wearing pink and have a simple gathering picnic where I can meet my friends and chill.

She's such a bitch!!!

Indignation programs: http://plu.sg/indignation/

Lost

2007-08-03T23:46:00.000+08:00

It's just one of those times, where I will seek my blog for refuge, simply because I do not really know how I can express my thoughts spoken, unless I keep it in words, written, to finally work things out with myself while I'm thinking of what I can write.

I don't seem to be able to appreciate what I have now, simply because I can't. I am debating with myself if it is even worth appreciating, because when I think of it, it didn't even make my heart tinge a single bit, when it's supposed to be.

I made comparisons. I know its unfair, but I still did. Sigh, I wished I could elaborate more, but this post seemed like another of my vague ramblings, simply because I didn't want to rake up my personal issues for public viewing.

I love my new Vaio

2007-07-30T09:33:00.000+08:00

No I did not buy this because I'm too rich, or for nothing. My old computer died and was given a grand burial, and so my pocket went broke again on this Vaio.

I love my new Vaio... everything about it, except Windows Vista.

Happy birthday!

2007-07-23T19:23:00.000+08:00

Today's a special day for Yu Jie!! Happy birthday! Just realised you tagged me too, so here it goes!:

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1) Jasper
2) Casper (like so naturally right? Happens when people are out of nicknames to call me)
3) Jasper The Dummy (I know I started this but... hell)

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU'VE HAD:
1) jasperthedummy
2) xiaogou (*ruff!!*)
3) gayguy

THREE THINGS YOU'VE DONE IN THE LAST 33 MINUTES:
1) Idle
2) Porn
3) Drooled at 2 places

THREE THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1) Honest
2) Mummy's boy
3) My stick

THREE THINGS YOU DISLIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1) Naturally auto-roaming eyes
2) Gaydar that radiates radioactivity
3) I can't seem to reach there with my mouth... sigh

THREE PARTS OF YOUR ORIGINS:
1) Xeloric Martian
2) Casper's squirt
3) My mum and dad

THREE THINGS YOU'RE AFRAID OF:
1) Nasty monsters intruding faggortland!
2) Nasty cockroaches
3) Nasty... erm I don't think I'm afraid of anything else?

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1) Freshbox tee
2) PaNtIeS!!! YAY!!
3) Shorts

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1) My hair products
2) Mobile phone (it controls my life)
3) Clothes are not essential, right?

THREE IMPORTANT OBJECTS:
1) Ditto
2) Ditto
3) Dicktto

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS:
1) Fahrenheit
2) Lickin' Park (do you, by any chance, know where's that place?)
3) S.H.E (Sucking Huge Egos)

THREE WAYS TO BE HAPPY:
1) Walking along beaches, enjoying the scenery
2) Walking along Ang Siang Hill, enjoying the scenery
3) Walking along IMH, filling and signing a form

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS AT PRESENT:
1) 说你爱我 - S.H.E
2) Never again - Kelly Clarkson
3) 谢谢你的温柔 - S.H.E/Fahrenheit

THREE NEW THINGS YOU WANT TO TRY IN THE NEXT 12 MONTHS:
1) Earn money
2) Work hard
3) Start my physical training

THREE THINGS YOU REGRET:
1) Settling for too little
2) Losing what you thought you never needed
3) Not cherishing what I got, and keeps it dangling

THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
1) Maturity
2) Mutual care
3) Balanced love/sex motivation

THREE IMPORTANT THINGS YOU'VE GIVEN TO THE WORLD:
1) My morals
2) I don't think I'll give babies but I'll try with my boyfriend?
3) My bright side

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE (not in order)
1) I love you
2) I set my priorities right, always
3) Music is my life

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX:
1) Cute guy
2) Body
3) Fabulous hair!!

ps: I think I'm a grrrrllll!!!!!

THREE EMOTIONAL (?) THINGS YOU LIKE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX:
1) Maturity
2) Intelligence
3) Long-sighted

ps: Dicktto!!!!!

THREE THINGS YOU JUST CAN'T DO:
1) Break my stick
2) Grab a cockroach with my hands
3) A 10 inch

THREE THINGS YOU MISS FROM YOUR PAST:
1) Alot
2) Alot more
3) Alot, alot more?

THREE GIFTS YOU WOULD LIKE TO RECEIVE:
1) If you asked me
2) A more practical answer for this question is:
3) Money?

THREE REASONS WHY YOU ARE WHO YOU ARE:
1) My stick
2) My character
3) My anti-homophobe helmet

THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE HOBBIES:
1) Movies
2) Chatting
3) Music

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1) Shopping spree
2) Hoping I can complete this soon!
3) Some personal time =)

THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING:
1) Entrepreneur
2) Designer (web, print, advertorial)
3) Shake leg tai tai

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO FOR HOLIDAY:
1) Japan
2) Korea
3) Australia (I wanna go again!)

THREE CARTOON CHARACTERS:
1) Scooby Doo
2) Bugs Bunny
3) Casper?

THREE BOYS' NAMES:
1) Tom
2) Dick
3) Hairy

THREE GIRL'S NAMES:
1) Nicole
2) Kelly
3) Bitch (It's a name right? Heard so many people with the same name)

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1) A kiss goodbye, from someone I love
2) Hold my own concert
3) Do the many many things I wished to do

THREE PEOPLE YOU WANT TO DO THIS:
1) Suk Wai
2) Jonathan Lai
3) Yangfa

Yeah I'm just kiddin' around on some. Hehe. =P

Updates

2007-07-22T01:01:00.001+08:00

I've not blogged about updates in my life for quite some time, simply because that I'm literally swamped with work. I'll be working on quite a bit of things in the weeks to come (or rather months), with schoolwork and event planning for IndigNation 07 both coming up to me at the same time. Also, I've just clinched a deal for another design job (yes that's me on New Paper, and thanks to that), and I also have some personal project in the works, some still working with the partners, some still in the stage of conceptualising it, and some left with the remnant bits waiting for implementation.

Sounds like quite a bit, huh.

Yes, some people did hear rumors about me being attached. I am. I don't want to blog about the dramatic part of it, simply because it's complicated. But wait, my friends are calling me a lesbian butch trapped in a man's body already. =P

So yeah, I'm now like a clown juggling balls (and balls-balls =P) at the same time huh? Lesbian butch clown that juggles a lot of work, loves men and dicks, while trapped in a man's body and not feeling gender dysphoric at all. How's that? That's pretty messed up, you think? Hahahaha.

Oh well. I know I'm typing crap but hey, at least I blogged, ya'know?

Asian boys - worth every single cent

2007-07-18T01:20:00.000+08:00

*This is not a review. Just a very personal take on just how good I felt it was*

I am loss of words to describe how good it was. Like Ian said to me the other day after he watched it, there wasn't a single naked body throughout the play, but yet the experience was amazingly wonderful, and powerful.

Thanks to Yangfa dearest for the tickets (thank you thank you thank you!!!), I was able to watch it at a rather good seat with Marcus. Although I didn't pay for it, for those who did, it's certainly worth their every single cent.

I am very tempted to talk about certain elements and issues highlighted in the play, but I didn't quite want to spoil it for you. It is just so meaningful that, it makes you ponder on those issues hard while you are just the audience. And yes, for once, a meaningful, high-profiled gay play, with a happy ending.

*claps*

Cao gay

2007-07-06T13:39:00.000+08:00

I walked out of PLAY yesterday with Ian after a meeting, heading towards the nearby road to grab a cab home. I gave Ian a goodbye hug, and he gave me a friendly kiss on the cheek.

Suddenly, we heard someone shout, "Cao gay!"

I wasn't too concerned at first because I don't think we need to care about whoever that shouted that, because they probably got too much time in their hands and a puny brain to not know how such comments can hurt people.

But on the cab, it suddenly struck me: I was in Tanjong Pagar! What? Homophobia in Tanjong Pagar? Oh god what is Tanjong Pagar coming to?

But ah anyway, a very good point to bring up here is that homophobia will exist everywhere, even in places like Tanjong Pagar where the residents are generally more accepting of homosexuals than in other areas. Don't ever make it a place where you can be too comfortable to be in.

Like how our local police force always like to say, "We don't mistake peacefulness for peace".

No time to breathe

2007-07-05T19:43:00.000+08:00

This entire week had been this weird spin of events, desirable and undesirable, which I don't really know how to explain. People I've spoken to should know what is this about, but it's just very weird and tiring. I've never been in such a entanglement before, and no, it's not fun to be entangled in any way.

My week was spent mainly on my assignments, and I went out every single day from last Saturday. My pocket money depleted, and begged for money the moment my parents came back from Genting. Looking at my wallet, sigh it's just miserable.

Caught up with longantree. Man, it's been 5 months since we last met, and I still fondly remember the time we spent last time when both of us still had time to spare. I'm glad that he's doing well, and that he had retired from his position in his CCA. Glad also that you are making progress with someone you liked, and I'm happy for you. =)

Well... Yes I'm going to be out... again, for a meeting. I just hope this freaky week can end fruitful, and I'm not hoping too much that this week will end too soon.

Great fun day

2007-07-01T03:12:00.000+08:00

You must watch Transformers or you will regret for the rest of your life! (or at least before the DVD version comes out)

Anyway, I had a really fun day today. Watched Transformers (which was fully booked/packed that we have to make do with the 1st freaking row), and OMG I think I'm going to sound like a juvenile but it's fucking cool lah! Haha I'm so easily fascinated.

Met up with some new people after watching the performance by NP concert band, and stayed for a little bit too late. Still managed to catch the last bus home.

Now, at home, I have no peace. My parents went for vacation in Genting, which is supposed to make me feel alone at home. Instead of being alone, my brother brought back his friends back to the house, like a house-party. Best thing of all, they are playing Mahjong.

So typical right? Ahh well, I shall comment no more.

Something to think about

2007-06-29T20:16:00.000+08:00

Why does God hate amputees?
http://www.whydoesgodhateamputees.com/

ps: This may be the only point I agree to, simply because it was visible to me. I feel that the author of these videos was being too extreme in most of his other videos, because the very same message can be conveyed in other non-overpowering ways. If I were a Christian, I'll probably turn this "satanic teaching" off when I first see it. Of course, I'm referring to his other videos, not this one, because the arguments are valid, supported by statistics, and definitely strong enough to stand on its own.

No one has ever grew a leg back naturally after it's been amputated, with or without prayer.

In case you thought I'm atheist, I'm actually agnostic.

Tough choice

2007-06-27T22:29:00.000+08:00

Choices are part of life. You meet them, select an option, and go. It can be a fast one, like choosing between what's in your wardrobe to wear for the day. It may be a very tough one, like choosing your right career path. It all ultimately boils down to, choice.

I don't like tough choices for one, especially when you see quality in each choice that you will want to pursue. You'll want both, or even hope to mix and match. You want everything you wanted perfect, but that's not possible. They are still 2 totally different choices.

Grass is always greener on the other side. Once you've made your choice, you may feel a sense of regret. You hate yourself for making that choice, and ends up beating up yourself for being too stupid and disoriented to have chosen such a silly choice. Is the other choice that ideal and perfect if you had chosen it?

Recently, I had to make a choice. It's not a very easy choice, but the choice I am more interested to pursue may only last in the short term. I have no faith, but yet I was too tempted to pursue it. The other choice, is much brighter in the long term, but has it shortcomings for being not too popular a choice to choose.

Stable path or glamorous tragic ending? I wished the gay god can show me a sign; a rainbow or something.

Information needed

2007-06-21T13:41:00.000+08:00

Hi, people that are reading my blog! I will need some information here, and if you think you have them, please email me at jasperthedummy@gmail.com.

Very recently, I posted on this blog about a talent scout spotting me in the streets, telling me that I may be suitable to do modelling (link). I did not manage to get the company's name for that one, but I was approached just outside Cineleisure.

On Tuesday, I am "spotted" again at the same place, but this time, I managed to get the card, with the name of the talent scout handwritten on the piece of card that printed "Create Talents Pte Ltd". I left my number with them, thinking that I can always do my own research about them at home.

They have a website (http://www.createtalents.com), which looked really choppily done. I do not want to assert that they are scamming people into believing that they are a legitimate talent agency, but this, this and this (a report about talent scam companies) could already warn and convince me enough.

From Pricilla88 of the MediaCorp Communities forum:

[...] I understand that some of you have been approached by Create Talents to shoot commercials, adverts etc..the thing is..I have been approached also!! I'm supposed to pay not just $300, but $450 (min) for a 3-outfit makeover on 16th June..before that date, I still can change my mind..does anyone know whether they are ok or not? I checked their website but no information can be found..help help..I don't want to be conned!! [...]

Source: MediaCorp Communities Forum

As from what I know, it's rather normal to be asked to pay a sum of money to build a portfolio, but $450? Usually IF the agency is particularly interested in you, your portfolio will most probably be subsidized. Unless if you approach the company yourself but the company isn't really interested in you, you will then need to pay for your own portfolio.

A very suspicious thing about the entire experience is that, while I'm approached by the "talent scout", which quite obviously was a migrant from China, he was holding a small notebook with a lot of pages filled with names and contact numbers.

I never knew that talent was so easy to find.

Just a few hours ago, I received a phone call from a lady from Create Talents, asking if I will be free tomorrow. We scheduled for an interview at 4:30PM tomorrow in their offices at Singapore Shopping Centre. I am not planning to go for it, and I will not be calling them to tell them that I am not going.

Apparently from the research I have done, they seemed to be linked to "i models" (http://www.imodelsinternational.com/), located at Park Mall.

I need people that know about Create Talents, or any other "talent agencies" with suspicious practices to contact me via email at jasperthedummy@gmail.com. Your input to me will be kept in strict confidence.

(Phone call recordings are to follow, so stay tuned!)

Had great fun

2007-06-18T22:05:00.001+08:00

I felt great yesterday, and it was such a fun day. Went over to Powerhouse @ St. James for the AFA party, and I met some new people.

Called Marcus to come along, and Marcus brought Pris. Pris went home at about 1am, and I continued dancing till about 3am.

Haven't relaxed that much after a long while of work, because I haven't really partied in months.

Marcus told me someone wanted to dance with me, but I didn't notice. Ah oh well...

Sometimes I wonder why I am always working so hard.

Born to be

2007-06-14T01:05:00.000+08:00

"My dream is to spend my life to do what I was born to do." - Paul Potts

He made me cry.

Wisdom tooth ache

2007-06-11T22:20:00.000+08:00

I have 2 wisdom teeth on my lower jaw, and I must say that I am very blessed to be having a set of beautiful teeth. However, a new wisdom tooth is growing fast on the left side of my upper jaw, which will effectively interfere and collide with the wisdom tooth in my lower jaw if it grows into a full size tooth.

Argh. And I'm still thinking of becoming a chao gheng kiah to only pluck my wisdom teeth in army... hehehe. But ok lah, if I were to pluck them when I get into National Service, on top of the 2 weeks off, I'll get government subsidy for the procedure cost too. Current costs are like roughly $200 per tooth? (correct me if I'm wrong)

Right now, it's just aching a bit, because the premature tooth kept rubbing on the wisdom tooth at my lower jaw, which is rather uncomfortable. I will not have to remove them this urgently if it was not for the premature tooth. Those that are already there are growing and maintained well.

And yes you heard me right. All my wisdom teeth are sprouting while I'm still 18. But ok lah, not a real shocker, just that most people grow them in their twenties or thirties.

Sigh. I'm not too sure if I should remove it either. I have to see how it goes.

Because.... (confession time!)

I HATE AND IS EXTREMELY TERRIFIED OF SEEING A DENTIST! (Because the dentist I had in my primary school days was just horrifying)

And that's dentistophobia for you.

Random: Why does all hawt gay boys live in the east?!?! Is it genetical?

Creepy

2007-06-08T23:30:00.000+08:00

Actually I knew about this sometime ago, but I did not really care to pursue it. Someone used my email address to try to sign up for a Trevvy account, and uploaded pictures taken from my blog into that account. That account did not defame me or something, but in fact it told people to visit my blog and email me (which I wondered why).

I've emailed Trevvy to take down that account (because I need the email address to register mine), and meanwhile I tried accessing into that account by clicking on "Forget Password". I got the password reset and all the photos removed.

To whoever that created that account: Thanks. If you were looking to create a mini-fanclub for me, please use your email address.

It creeped me out. It's like someone was watching your every move, and to the point of putting up photos taken from my blog into that account? Who knows he's been secretly fantasising to the photos or what? Wow, I never knew I'm so well loved. I even received kisses and spanks with that account.

And yes I heard you saying, "Ey ya! Proud already lah!"

Heh. Oh well...

But please. Don't do this kind of thing to others. You might think you are helping me out, but yeah, maybe some people just preferred to be NOT on something.

Finally a break

2007-06-07T22:39:00.000+08:00

Frankly, I haven't been really studying over the past weeks, because everything inside me is just in a mess. I didn't really show it out to everyone, and it fact only the closest people to me knew about it.

Argh, but heck, now's the start of the term break (of 2 weeks), and I'm gonna make full use of it.

I really want to go on a vacation, and Bangkok and Genting came to mind. Not too sure where I'd be heading though, but Bangkok will certainly be fun. I neeeeddd money too...

Sigh. I'm now debating on the whole purpose of something, and I just couldn't make up my mind. I don't want to seem messed up, but hell knows why I am so messed up these days.

Good gaydar

2007-06-06T22:32:00.000+08:00

I just overheard my mum's conversation with my brother about clothing. It's freaky, really.

She was describing about a buff male teacher in a certain international school she works in, that likes to wear really bright and tight clothings. I sense that she was trying hard not to shout "Gayyyyyy!!", but yeah, she totally just gave herself away.

She has a mind-blowingly good gaydar. But ok lah, as it seems that the male teacher simply fits into every single gay stereotype... so yeah, I can't tell quite yet, but she undeniably has a gaydar.

Mummy... mummy... How I wished you stereotyped me the same (I know this sounds terribly wrong), and acknowledge that I am still gay as normal. Heh. "Gay as normal".

But she's forgiven. I don't exactly go in tight tees one size smaller. I just wear things not too large or small. Things that fit.

Just wished she could claim her gay son back one day.

[Random:
People are all the same
And we only get judged by what we do
Personality reflects name
And if I'm ugly then
So are you
- Sugababes]

We love idiosyncrasies

2007-06-05T09:48:00.000+08:00

I have tried to convince myself that I can like someone that is as normal as me, enthusiastic, crazy at times, not too bad looking, and devoted (ha! ha! ha!), and perhaps quite good to interact with.

But I realised that I can't.

Most of the time, I like people because there are some unique features about them, and therefore for that single part of him, causes me to totally adore him. If there's another person that is rather normal, behaving like how everyone else behaves, and is rather similar to my character without any major unique idiosyncrasies, I wouldn't have liked him, as I would have liked to.

I spoke to 2 friends over the past week about the same issue, and that couldn't be more true as they felt the very same way. We couldn't bring ourself to fall in love with someone without any significant or unique idiosyncrasies, and even if we cannot classify them as "boring" simply because they are rather chirpy and bubbly, we still can't - there's nothing much unique about them for us to fall deep love in.

I realised, that most of us don't fall for the person alone. Most of us fall for their problems. Let's say Pete has a BIG problem getting on from his previous relationship, and shares it with you constantly though he likes you. Seriously, I'm sure you've heard of such stories and people do fall in love with all these people! (that came from personal experience =P )

A big tragedy for me is that, I fall in love too often with people that are cold, not passionate. People that are not the ones that would take initiative, the ones that will only move unless I moved first - but that's for the best case scenario.

Sad hor?

Yeah I felt so too. I can go on and on about how unfair it is for me to fall for these people, but oh well, I guess I can't blame anyone for whom I actually will adore.

Frankly, too much of "unique idiosyncrasies" tires me out.

"Anything" pre-launch site makes confession

2007-06-01T23:32:00.000+08:00

"GAY SEX. NICE, I MIGHT WANT THAT TOO..."

That's pretty honest. =P

Anything and Whatever pre-launch teaser site here: click.

You start regretting giving up on whom you did not treasure

2007-06-01T22:31:00.000+08:00

I didn't want to spell out exactly who, but in fact, this might have referred to so many people I've possibly hurt, slashed, killed and burned. I lost count of how many, but all of you are still so nice towards me.

I didn't treasure whom I had, and gave up maintaining it, being too fussy, or letting them take things too much on their stride.

And now I'm regretting it.

Regretting it because I saw your face again. Regretting it because I felt how wrong I was, to have made the wrong moves, thrown in the wrong emotions, and guided by my feelings that lasted only minutes.

I've tried alternatives. Not you, but someone else. It didn't work, somehow.

Then you were with someone else. Jealousy plagued my emotions, but there was no way back. I couldn't reverse time; call you up for a patch where that possibility has already flown far; suddenly said I loved you; asked if I could meet you.

It's gone, for I had not treasured.

"No use crying over spilled milk," and this couldn't have been more true than it is.

So many I've hurt - repeating itself, over, and over again.

Validated

2007-05-27T02:09:00.000+08:00

I was feeling fluffy today and so I decided to dress up a little (sorry, no pictures for this one), and I was walking towards Cineleisure when someone tapped by shoulders from the back.

"Hi, would you be interested to model for a clothing company for men, and you may be featured on magazines?"

I rejected him, but I did walk away smiling, feeling validated.

It's a nice feeling to be validated for something like modeling. So happy! =P

Time to learn

2007-05-23T22:26:00.000+08:00

Don't ever fall in too deep, because there might not be a return trip back.

Fuck: A timeline view

2007-05-20T12:07:00.001+08:00

I was quite impressed with the power of Google's new tool, the Timeline view, which will give you phrases captured from various points in time for whatever you've searched for.

So, well, I decided to give the word "fuck" a test.

Click here fucker. =P

And WOW, it originated from 1278!

Haha. Okay, I'm running late for a meeting! Gotta go!

Religion extremism

2007-05-17T19:06:00.000+08:00

Has religion destroyed more than it has saved?

Iranian police arrest over 80 at birthday party:
http://www.fridae.com/...d=1925&viewarticle=1
http://www.irqo.net/IRQO/English/pages/055.htm

Iranian men hanged for committing 'gay acts':
http://www.fridae.com/d=529&viewarticle=1
http://www.ukgaynews.org.uk/Archive/2005july/2101.htm

The Centennial Olympic Park bombing:
http://www.adl.org/extremism/rudolph_backgrounder.asp
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eric_Robert_Rudolph

3 stabbed in Israeli gay pride march:
http://en.wikinews.org/wi...gay_pride_marchers

It's weak to say that someone is "saved" by religion based on the promise of eternal life. What happens if that someone doesn't believe in the same God as you do? Yet, many lives are ended from that ridiculous hate, which had been witnessed all around the world.

Note that I am only talking about extremists and fundamentalists, not all other faithful believers. As much as I want to preach about sexuality tolerance, I too must observe respect to other non-violent religious organisations out there.

Of you ask me about the recent crackdown of Iranian gay youths, it really hurts me to know that people are still being tortured and put to death simply because they are gay. Your life ends because you are gay, just because of religious laws that govern others but not you.

Similarly withgarding the repeal of 377A, should religion play a part in how we govern a nation with a large variety of religions like Singapore? Should I, as a freethinker be governed under the same law forced into action by a certain faith? Should he, as a gay Buddhist, be criminalised just because the Christians (which takes up only 12% of the population in Singapore) quote from the Christian bible that sodomy is sin? Should people enforce their own belief on others?

Should I, as a gay man, even believe you when you said that you love me, but hate my "homosexual sin"?

Love

2007-05-14T01:02:00.000+08:00

I was out just now for the closing night of "The Swimming Instructor" with my dearest cousin, and watching it for the second time, I felt it was better than the first (of course), though the experience is that the lines are a bit rushed. Overall, it was quite good, and I always wondered what Wee Hong did to get man-boobs that big. =P

ps: really a big thank you must go out to darling Loretta. If not for your last minute arrangements I would have been stucked right outside the theatre. Thanks!!!

After that, we headed off to the food court nearby to chat for a bit, and me being me, got into talking about the topic of love.

It was sweet to see how Yee (my dearest cousin) is happily attached, though they often disagreed with each other. To frankly put it, I was quite envious in fact, because I have never been an attractor for relationships, especially a long lasting one. Everytime it comes, I will contribute to that relationship by giving away so much of myself, yet getting little in return, causing me to give up unwillingly most of the time.

Well, I can't complain much, because we can't always get what we want, can we?

I would say my attraction towards someone is much less sexual, and much more emotional. Of course, who likes an ugly fugly boyfriend right? A decent looking one, mature mindset and a caring character. I'm not asking too much, right?

A lot of times when I meet someone new, and is attracted to him, I am just too shy to even give the slightest hint about my feelings for him. Even if I know that person through a close friend, I won't even dare to tell my friend about it, for it might end up being an embarrassing episode at the end. Unless my friend doesn't know him personally, it's not within my character to express my feelings to another friend of his. I hate rejection in relationships, and in fact, who doesn't? I'm just too afraid of rejections in fear that I can't handle it, in fear that I will lose whom I confessed to.

Ahh... Blah. This is so unlike me these days that I'm involved in so many other things to be thinking about such emo subjects. So rather than me looking for an relationship, I don't know if I'm selfish but, I would rather be sought after? (If I will actually be sought after, that is)

And if that comes as a hint to you, just swallow and look here: click. =p

Why did your ex-gay ministry get bashed?

2007-05-11T01:03:00.000+08:00

Simple. There are 10 reasons to it.

1. You sound like someone I met in a gay club.
2. Everyone else on the panel gave opinions on the issue, while you preached.
3. You sound confusing, and realises that.
4. You tend to contradict yourself.
5. You run an ex-gay ministry without EVER touching on the issue of homosexuality.
6. You said you are straight "at least for now".
7. You like to consume things.
8. You consume even more.
9. The audience can visually see that you consume things often.
10. Your disciple sounds just like you.

Bonus:
11. You made a confession that you've only met Mr. Wrongs, perhaps hinting that your "normal" orientation happened as a result.

A new look

2007-05-08T23:59:00.000+08:00

I was quite desperate for a haircut today, because my hair was just too long and ugly. It's getting very, very hard to manage.

People said that gay boys will never change their hairstylists. Well, I changed! I broke that stereotype! Muhahaha.

But ah, actually it's because my stylist wasn't around today and that's why I had to get another to do my hair. Hehe. But hey, they are having an offer for all chemical treatments, and I just decided, heck, I'll try it out. Well, 50% discount is attractive, but the overall cost is still $70-80? Still freaking expensive for me.

And something interesting: I was browsing through CLEO in the saloon, and I was reading an issue that's about a few months back. David Gan's friends gave him a surprise birthday party at freaking Swissôtel The Stamford. Can't imagine their wealth. But wait that's besides the point.

CLEO apparently interviewed him and Zoe Tay bitch about food, and Zoe quoted some laksa stall she liked, while the magazine writes that David Gan recommended Zoe to a Duck Rice stall at Maxwell Food Centre.

Righttttt........

Anyway, that probably won't interest you much, but I was just giggling at how ironic it was while I'm reading it in the saloon. David Gan... Maxwell... Duck Rice... =)

Oh wells.

Denial

2007-05-08T00:46:00.000+08:00

Sometimes I just feel that it's all a bitch just caring about the problems surrounding me, and that's probably the reason for most of my newly-grown white hair recently. Well, I've been taking things slow, but not quite steadily.

And yes, I was happy that I just got out from my record breaking 2 months long period of denial, where I just stopped caring about people and concentrated in what I am supposed to do. As you can see, the reason why I'm blogging here is the effects of getting out of denial. Think only women suffer from PMS? Try me.

Now, I started caring the people around me again, and yeah, I'm just back to my emo self again. Should start an emo club or something. I hate being emo for one. Like I'm being labelled as a freak. Wait, I am a freak. =)

I think it's the weather that's causing these hormonal changes in me. Freaking weather, rains when I need to go out, and just damn humid when I'm at home even while I'm typing this right now. Certainly not a very good time if you are considering some vigorous cardio-workout in your humid room. You'll probably be receiving flowers tomorrow near your tomb.

Yes it's the weather I'm sure. So please carry your durians home in your hands and don't use a plastic bag! Have to pay 10cents also. Boh huah.

Anyways, didn't know where I got the energy but it's really been a long while since I connected with some people. Just went a lil' MSN frenzy the other day talking to people I haven't seen in ages, and it was fun! But considering how many people were actually attached like it's some kind of mating season, I couldn't help but to feel a bit depressed, but happy for them nonetheless.

But cheers for me, cuz I'm back! If I'm feeling emo I tend to blog more I noticed... hehe.

My hands are full

2007-05-01T23:26:00.000+08:00

If you ever noticed, I have never posted up any kind of apology to address my disappearance from my blog after a long while. For the first time, I'm really sorry for not updating frequently.

Many things happened these few months. The reason ranges widely: from a packed schedule to a deliberate disappearance. Well, sometimes shit happens, and you have to deal with it and so on. Blogging used to be my venting space, somewhere I can pour out my frustrations to, but I realised I can't vent everything here nowadays. I just cannot do that anymore.

Anyway I am not feeling emo, sad or something bad right now. I'm just trying to explain about my disappearance here.

I'm currently working on a gazillion things, and among that is school work. A new semester has started, and I'm currently in my 2nd year. My modules were lessened; 3 core modules, but the workload hasn't. Time management is key I guess.

What am I working on currently? I'm working on 4 other projects other than school. Wow, even Superman don't have the skill to split himself into 5. Even if he can, I'm reserving one of him for myself! ;P

Ahh... I guess I'll take this as a test of how much I can actually handle.

RU12

2007-04-22T17:45:00.000+08:00

[via Pink.sg]

I must say this was a rather well done piece (forgiving the sound quality). Features Steven Lim, and even one of my friend whom I have not came out to!

Glad to know that she's gay friendly! =)

Splendid party indeed!

2007-04-22T11:25:00.000+08:00

Nothing beats seeing something that you planned for more than a month round off with a success. I have never in my life planned a party of this scale, and I must say that I do tend to worry too much sometimes.

The party was... not really going as planned because too many last minute circumstances popped up, and it ended too soon. But anyway, come to think about it, it was great that we are still able to pull it off like nothing serious had happened.

I was just pleasantly surprised by the compliments I got for the t-shirt designs, despite me doing them up at the very last minute. These are the things that motivates me haha. ;)

Other than that, I'm just very very tired. I feel like taking a long rest, but I couldn't because we cannot afford a standstill after the party. People donated to us, hoping that we can revolutionise bloody homophobic Singapore, and so must we work hard to realise that dream.

Thanks for all that donated, bought t-shirts and snapped photos. =)

Short rambling

2007-04-19T01:00:00.000+08:00

Scary shit. Some Korean student shot 33 students dead in a university in US. I can't imagine myself being there, with a madman shooting my friends like we are all in the deathrow. More freaky shit is that I dreamt about me driving a car down a road, with chopped off human heads laid on the road, 1 in every 100 meters, and all of them are gay activists. Dead, decapitated gay activists.

Kinda looks like I'm driving down the roads of the middle east eh?

Scary shittttteeeee.....

Anyways, I've been seriously busy with the party, making sure that nothing will go wrong. Ah, that has been my whole life the past weeks, and so you better come ok?!!

Haha. Ok I think I should really end here! Still have poster to do up!

Find out more about the party here: http://www.queercast.net/show/.../were-throwing-a-party/

...and yes, you WILL see me on the party! =)

Insane excitement!

2007-04-05T00:09:00.000+08:00

The QueerCast.Net launch party is coming up very very soon, and it only seem that good things come our way! Today we just managed to get one of our potential sponsors to support us, of which I will not discuss about the client before further discussions have been made. It's exciting when you see something you have put in so much labor to bear forth fruit.

That explains my absence in blogging recently, huh?

Well, it's tiring, but I felt really happy doing what I enjoyed doing, especially when the people around us are extremely good to us, including our listeners which skyrocketed since the launch of the website. Thanks to all that commented and emailed us, we are just out of words to express how grateful we are.

I've never organised a party, not even my own, though I'm quite good in planning for small outings and stuffs. Many ideas just runs in my head. So many things I want to do, so many things I hope to do, and so many things I need to do, sometimes it just amazes me how determined I can be sometimes. I am actually quite a lazy and homely person, really.

I guess it's perhaps part of a passion, a wanting, an anger, and a desire which I can do something good - for myself maybe.

Well, nothing is perfect. There are still so many dreams and passions I want to fulfill in this lifetime. I want my life to be a fruitful and meaningful one. I have big dreams, and I believe that with every small step, the fulfillment of dreams is just another step away.

Don't laugh at me for this, but I believe that small sticks don't choke, but if they are too small, we have a problem. =)

QueerCast.Net Launch Party!

2007-04-02T18:58:00.000+08:00

More information: http://www.queercast.net/.../were-throwing-a-party/

Ladies, mark your calendars! I bet this party will be the best you've ever been to! See you there! =)

Bottled up

2007-03-24T03:17:00.000+08:00

You might have noticed that I'm not blogging much about how I am recently, and how I used to rant here about the little things that bothers me. I want to, but recently I think I was just trying to delusionise myself from thinking of all that unhappy thoughts, things I couldn't let go, things I thought I had forgotten from some time ago.

I am actually a little sober now, after some drinking at MOX and PLAY with an empty stomach. I don't know why, but getting sober under the influence of alcohol does reverse effects on me. It does not make me happier, but it does make me feel depressed.

Over the past weeks, for some reason, I just decided that I don't really want to hang out that much. I spent many of my days just staying at home watching movies from my movie archive, watching dramas, and working on QueerCast.Net. To keep things simple, you can say that I'm just trying to keep myself occupied while being at home. I have to say I was literally cleared of all my worries, and I enjoyed so much just being alone. I'm amazed at how that worked out to my benefit.

I didn't even bother going online to chat with friends. It's just one of those times you want to close up yourself to spend time alone.

I'm happy, to a certain level I think. It just sucks to be out again; to be in touch with the real world; to recall things I don't want to remember; to feel that same feeling of secret admiration yet you have no courage to tell; to be back to being what I am.

It's like standing on quicksand. You don't fall in as fast if you don't move too much. Yet, you might have a bad itch at your waist, and you moved to scratch it. As much as I'm closing myself a little, sometimes it's inevitable that I had to move about.

Still, I enjoy hanging out with friends... catching up with them, and sharing things about yourself. Sometimes it just takes some good company to cast all your worries behind.

You know, I really hate the feelings I have that are coming back to me. As much as I don't want to remember them, they are just... there.

I'm just bottling myself.

God, protect me from some of your people

2007-03-18T09:57:00.000+08:00

Let's just say someone called Johnny the bully likes tangoing on pig feces, and forces everyone to do it with him. You will allow that to happen, wouldn't you?

"Council of churches commends singapore government on anti-gay legislation, calls for criminalisation of lesbianism"
- Fridae.com

"Penal Code: Proposed changes 'relevant and compassionate'"
- Methodist Message

"Free community church and SAFE object to NCCS's support of gay sex laws"
- Fridae.com

"Criminalise lesbianism, say Church leaders"
- Yawningbread

"Review of the Derby Resolutions on Human Sexuality"
- Methodist Church UK (seeking review of 6 resolutions relating to sexuality made in 1993)

"Lesbianism to be outlawed too"
- Plume.sg

"Latest News of Bigotry (Singapore)"
- Sayoni.com

PLAY small

2007-03-17T03:29:00.000+08:00

I'm a good and well bred mummy's boy, so I didn't exactly go and check out Happy while it was still open - I was still under aged back then.

Now, it's PLAY. Good music, but with a really small dance floor, serving soda water for kids with 0.00000000001% alcohol content perhaps, and terrible jail-like bamboo sticks blocking human traffic.

Not exactly the club to be if you are a podium-hog, cuz the so called podium is just 10cm taller than the floor.

Still, I like free entry to clubs. =)

Hahahahahaha!!1

2007-03-13T02:30:00.000+08:00

[via Lancerlord]

What an educational program for kids!!!

Saddam not dead!

2007-03-10T20:24:00.000+08:00

I have no say about the debate behind his hanging, but strangely enough I find this wickedly funny. =)

Doctor ah!!! Quick come!!!

2007-03-09T23:19:00.000+08:00

HELP ME!!!!~~~~

CLEO's 50 Most Eligible Bachelors 2007
Link: Yahoo! / Fridae

OMG I'm so gonna grab a copy of CLEO!

Celebrate CNY on Prom Night

2007-03-07T01:14:00.000+08:00

Gong Xi Fa Cai ah~!

From NP Mail:
Yesterday, ICT had our Graduation Prom Nite 2007 and there were 25 tables of students, staff and alumni and all enjoyed the food, interaction and fun - thanks to the Graduation Prom Night Committee. During this time, we also celebrated Lunar New Year as well as our NIC Championship.

Just one of the things NP-ICT does.

Okay lah maybe I'm the only one finding this a bit odd but... erm... nevermind. =)

Fresh and new

2007-03-03T01:03:00.000+08:00

I'm feeling fresh and new now, probably because some air has finally cleared up. I've gotten my lessons too. True colours are ever so vibrant now.

Anyway, I've been watching the Taiwan remake of Hanazakarino Kimitachihe, which was adapted from the original Japanese manga of the same name. If you are confused, the Taiwan remake is called "花樣少年少女" in Chinese.

I must say I am just so addicted the show now.

(D-Addicts Drama-wiki entry)

I think the main elements that attracted me to the show is the frequent associations with the queer genre, and Wang Dong Cheng, Jiro (pictured right), is playing as a bisexual, though one cannot really define him as one due to the mixed complications in the role he played, and the conditions he is in. Another element, was of course that he was just so very cute. =P

It's currently airing on Channel U, but I just simply refused to watch from there. Mediacorp, as usual, did all the cuts under the fear of Media Da Anti-gay, Mother Don't Allow, MDA. It's frustrating.

Why? It's only a few cuts, right?

There is significance behind this drama series, and that is bringing queer issues to mainstream acceptance. It managed to portray sexuality in an unbiased view, from bisexuality to gay and even questioning. What's more is that the characters are popular celebrities idolised by millions, which is really vital in pushing acceptance towards the viewing audience.

Notice I said that the drama portrays an unbiased view towards queer issues - the audience are therefore free to interpret them in whatever ways they want.

But gah, whatever it is, I do hope the DVD release of this drama promises to be uncut and unedited, because it will not go through the same censorship conveyor-belt as Mediacorp does, which strangely breeds thousands of queer employees, ranging from directors to producers, and even actor/actresses.

"That CNA guy... please come out... please come out..."

I still think Wu Zun's looks is too overrated. =P

What I wanted

2007-03-02T15:04:00.000+08:00

I found trouble expressing myself with words here. Maybe this song can portray what I wanted better.

Things I never thought will happen

2007-03-01T14:27:00.000+08:00

I got a call from school today, telling me all sorts of information I have to remember, but in brief, the project idea my team did for my CATS module got chosen for a campus-wide competition.

It's like lottery. Strikes only when you least expected and needed it.

Long things short, this was the email:

Dear Jasper & Team

Congratulations!!

We are pleased to inform you that your team has qualified for the final round of the NP Ideas Buzz Competition.
You therefore stand a chance to be among the top 10 teams to win prizes worth more than S$300 per team sponsored by ASME (Association of Small and Medium Enterprises).

The NP Ideas Buzz Competition aims at encouraging NP students like you to offer ideas for innovative and exciting products and services.
The winners of the competition could then apply for NP EnterpriZe! Scheme funding (co-funding of 70% up to a maximum of S$3,000 per project) or
ETDF (Entrepreneurial Talent Development Fund administered by SPRING Singapore) to start-up your promising business ideas.

In collaboration with IS CATS (Creative and Applied Thinking Skills) module, your team's project "PORTABLE SOLAR VOLTAGE CHARGER" is among the 18 projects short listed out of about 400 projects by an internal panel of judges to qualify for the final round. At this final round, a panel of judges who could include experts from industry will then select the top 10 teams.

Below are details of the judging for the final selection of the top 10 teams.

Date : Monday, 26 March 2007
Time : 9.40 am (Please come at least 10 minutes before your scheduled time for your presentation)
Venue: Entrepreneurs-Connect@ NP, Blk 72, #01-10

[Stalkers take note! :P]

Each team will be given 10 minutes with the judges - 5 minutes for presentation of your innovative product/service idea in the form of powerpoint, charts, exhibits or prototypes and 5 minutes for Q & A. The judges will evaluate each team on originality, practicality, clearly defined target/market/user, large potential market, few competitors/substitute products and potential for differentiation/competitive advantage.

The top 10 teams will then showcase their works on NP Ideas Buzz Day to be held on 26 April 2007 and be presented prizes sponsored by ASME.

If you need any advice, you may contact your ISCATS tutor, Elizabeth Mary Thorarajoo or me.

We wish you all the best and look forward to seeing you on 26 March 2007.

Dorene Yeo
Manager, Entrepreneurs-Connect@NP
Ngee Ann Polytechnic
Blk 72 #01-10
535 Clementi Road
Singapore 599489
Tel: (65) 6460-6339
Fax: (65) 6462-1669

Please visit our website at http://www.np.edu.sg/enterprise for more information.

400 competing project ideas, and 18 are chosen, 1 of which is mine? WTF.

Thank you

2007-02-26T15:39:00.000+08:00

My mum approached me just now, asking me why did I write all sort of nonsense on my "online diary". I asked her who told her about my blog. She refused to say. I suspect it's a relative of mine.

Whoever that relative/friend is, thank you for telling her about my blog, for I long hoped that some gossipy person could tell her what I am doing online, so that it will be so much more easier for me to tell my mum about the things I didn't really have the courage to put it in my mouth to tell her.

Please, tell her more. I'm sure she'd love to hear them.

She seemed to be dodging the topic, but she asked why I still didn't "change". I just answered her that this sort of things cannot be changed. She just kept quiet and dodged the topic again. Oh well, sometimes I wished she could approach me directly and ask me all the questions she wanted to ask.

Relatives

2007-02-20T19:43:00.000+08:00

Chinese New Year is all about getting together with your family, and asking each other about how everyone has been. Everything that aunties will be asking the younger generation will always revolve around academic, romantic relationships, or career. It is so fixed you can almost prepare a script that you can say every time they ask.

It's sometimes irritating.

Everyone hides behind a mask in these occasions. You will see relatives chatting and laughing, but, behind the mask hides a character that seemingly shouts the melody of distress. Everyone's calling for help, but they try to put that desire away, and create another front just to cope with what they are facing with.

I hide behind the closet. Funny, it seems. You will see some relatives looking at you like they knew something. You reach over to take a packet of Chrysanthemum tea, or a slice of my favourite Bak Kua, while brushing shoulders with them, sensing that the atmosphere all auspicious yet - suspicious. Do they actually know something new about me? What? Who told them? No one raised the issue with me it seems, but it appears all so clear that they might know something; perhaps I am just over-sensitive.

They gave ang paos like distributing flyers. With an mood-less face, it's hard to tell if they are enjoying the process of blessing someone with the red packet, or dreading the moment that they had to go through all these trouble, spending their own money to give money to all these darn kids. Some looked like they wished they had put $2 in the packet instead, but yet can't, because they needed to save face. Some packets looked like they had some code written on them, so much more ingenious than how Dan Brown decoded The Last Supper.

In the corner of the room, hides the nothing better to do, or I call them, "Television addicts". It seems, that the TV is all they needed to spend this occasion, and what they do is that they just sit in front of it the whole day, no matter in which relatives house they are. When you needed to find them, you will know where they are. Piled up at their side are stacks of DVD boxes, of which all are blockbuster titles. None too artsy... or are artsy titles considered a taboo?

Dinner time approaches, and everyone refuses to dine first, because the dining table is too small. Everyone starts recommending others to eat first, like how someone would introduce a person to a new romantic match, where the match is the food. The food turns cold, and someone finally decides that he's finally hungry. Everyone else is glad that someone started, and they just creep into the dining table, finishes the food really fast, and creeps out again.

The place turns into an illegal gambling den overnight, with bets in the Blackjack table ranging from $2 to $10. If you place a $50 dollar bet, get ready to be shunned away. The Mahjong table is strangely peaceful this year - no much interest in that I suppose, because Blackjack is simply the faster game to play.

The time has come to say goodbye. Everyone waves to everyone uttering words like, "Bye!". Procedural, as it seems, because it is so well practiced. Flash a smile, wave, and say bye. So simple. Even my grandma can do it. Loses its meaning somehow, but everyone just do it for the sake of it. I could add meaning to it. Just add a "Chee" in front. That's where we'll get an all dramatic Chinese New Year.

Gong Xi Fa Cai

2007-02-18T22:29:00.000+08:00

Such an old greeting. Haha. Probably cuz my Mandarin sucks.

Anyway, Gong Xi Fa Cai, Wan Shi Ru Yi!

Two fathers

2007-02-17T17:07:00.000+08:00

[via Fridae]

I almost cried when I saw this. He is really brave. What's wrong with having two fathers?

He has a really great voice btw. =)